Damn the scale…bring on the test pants!

Laurie in her smaller pants, taken from a high angle.
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Weirdest selfie yet! Trying to show you I’m back in my size 18W pants.

When we last left the ranch, Laurie was bitching maturely musing on why she only lost 1 f-ing pound may have slowed down in her weight loss this week.

Truth time, I was totally pissed. I worked hard, I slogged up mountains for cripes sake, I ate inside my allotted calories, I expressed hidden feelings, I DESERVED BETTER!!! 1 measly pound, hardly seemed worth it.

I know the drill, I know all of the good reasons why weight loss slows, I know logically that this is a long haul, I know that thinking like this leads to entitlement and entitlement thwarted leads to bingeing. But I wanna, wanna, wanna! (Hint that hidden rage is about to be unleashed).

Screw the pooch, toss the baby out with the bathwater, burn the f-ing forest AND the trees! If I can’t be thin IMMEDIATELY bring on the f-ing chips! (Sound familiar?)

My inner child’s run amok rending garments, tossing garbage, and stomping around in my head all because of my latest weigh-in. Scales are tools of the devil — especially doctors’ scales run by skinny 18-year-olds with oh so innocent widening eyes — but that’s another story.

Anyway, once I got THAT out of my system, I pulled some pants out of the drawer in order to head on down to Trader Joe’s to buy milk. Hmm, maybe NOT the best time to be food shopping. Nonetheless, I pulled on said pants, and then moaned to myself. Crap, not only am I not lighter, my pants have gotten tighter. Life sucks!

Then I realized, I had mistakenly pulled my 18Ws out of the back of the drawer instead of my current 20Ws. I had also pulled them up my thighs, AND zipped them before I understood my mistake. I’d only lost a pound, but I’d dropped a pants size in the 4 weeks of my podcast experiment.

This means that fat is down, and probably a little muscle is up, since I’m smaller.

So damn the scale, hooray for me, my experiment is working.

The above rant brought to you by the letter B

The letter B is a wonderfully diverse letter. For example, it can stand for Binge, Bitch, and Be.

When one is faced with rage, or temptation, one can do one of these three things:

  1. Binge – damn all of my goals, damn restraint, damn me!
  2. Bitch – I’m sick of counting the damn calories, Why can’t I just eat what I want and not gain weight? Life sucks right now!
  3. Be – I am who I am, I’m eating the best that I can, I will savor my life, I will bless myself with love, I forgive myself and I will choose life.
Comments box:

5 thoughts on “Damn the scale…bring on the test pants!

  1. Jodi

    I’m listening to your podcast. Great job…. I’m trying to lose 50lbs this year. I quit smoking last year and gained 30..the other 20 I gained over the last 3 years. I had lost 78 lbs. In 2000 and kept it off for years then slowly gains most back so I’m on a journey once again to take it off. I’m down 16 lbs so far!

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hi Jodi, thanks for taking the time to stop by. Congrats on the quitting!!! I too, used to smoke and it is a bear to beat that one. WTG! I surely know what a pain it is to feel like you’re retreading ground with your weight but great news that you’re taking steps now. New day, new time, new you. Please stop by whenever you need encouragement, or when you’ve had a victory. I’d love to build a supportive community around here for each other. I care.

      Reply
  2. Cheryl Carter

    Yay for Jodi for giving up smoking! No matter what our particular addiction, It’s all such an uphill battle, isn’t it? And now you have another one to be fought. I hope you come to Laurie’s COD to rant. We’re all in this together, as she says.

    Laurie, I love your “Plan” philosophy. I have written it down and I do hope you will share it on my blog. Would you like to do a guest blog? That might be cool. There’s lots of food for thought in them there words! Life is easier at times when all the options are spelled out for us, and that’s what you did. Brilliantly, I might add.

    Reply
  3. Diane

    I just wanted to tell you that I am excited that I just downloaded podcast episodes 38 to current so I can get caught up. I will be at the lake for 4 days and hope to be current by Sunday!

    Reply

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