Ep 0068 – Depression and Always Feeling Responsible. I’ll Miss You Robin Williams

Laurie in a blue headscarf enjoys some water at the next to top Zen place
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I’m thrilled to have made to the next to top Zen place for today’s show. Glad too, I brought more than one water bottle as it is HOT, even in the shade.

Podcast Recap

I mourn actor and comedian Robin Williams and ponder my own experience with depression. I decide to let go of feeling repsonsible for what happens to other people. For example, I felt I was disappointing you on Day 67 by not being thinner. But after exploring my issues with the diet/binge cycle further I realize I need to be true to myself and continue on with Intuitive Eating. I’m super excited when Brave Companion Cathi from Connecticut calls the bravery hotline during her own walk to share her take on intuitive eating and how she really feels about my journey. Brave companions Amy and Sue also post encouraging comments on Day 67. I really appreciate the support and it helps me look deeper. Welcome to new listeners Sandra and Suz who both post on Day 4, to Diane, a Body for Life champion, who posts several places to share her feelings and to support Crystal and others. Also welcome to new listeners and brave companions from Facebook, Fionna, who has a wonderful blog herself, and to Lisa, a successful loser and maintainer, who has made a decision to try intuitive eating herself. Many of our brave companions are good examples of why we can’t assume people’s relationship with food by their size.

Laurie wears a t-shirt featuring her old cartoon character, ToonaCat from ToonaCat.com

Digging through my drawers prior to hiking, I’m THRILLED to discover I still have an old ToonaCat’s Kids Club shirt from my old website. Come on, TC, it’s just you and me kid!

Laurie's shadow as she snaps the photo against the brown grass of the foothills on the hiking trail.

You can see my silhouette here at the bottom of the path. Look how hot it is for 7:30 am!

Big shady tree against the burnt foothills of the hiking trail

The one shady tree at the bottom of the path. Unfortunately, I’m not stopping here.

Don’t Suffer. Get Help!

Mentioned

Bonus Episode 67 Where I share my fearful feelings about being a failure and a disappointment

Amy’s encouraging comment on Day 67

Sue’s encouraging comment on Day 67

Episode 65 where Amy calls the bravery hotline

Infamous Episode on Day 4 where I walked around the park feeling pathetic because no one was commenting

Sandra’s Excellent post with her list of what’s working and what she’s working on with Intuitive Eating on Day 4.

Suz’s brave story on Day 4

The blog post the private caller speaks about where I bravely snap a pic of my backside and call myself a Rueben’s Woman

Diane’s first post on day 5

Diane’s post on my weight photos

Diane’s encouraging post on Who are the brave companions for Crystal.

Day 28 where I share my body for life story

Diane’s comments about being a body for life champion on Day 28

Brave Companion Fionna’s blog, Little Food Lies

Day 33 Where I sing a song I wrote when I was 8.

Want to have Fun Being Foolish too?

Participate in our new feature called “Foolish Fun“. Just call the bravery hotline 206-350-6445 or check out the send audio page on https://www.compulsiveovereatingdiary.com/how-to-send-audio/
And tell us a joke, riddle, a silly story, limerick, sing a song, play a kazoo, ANYTHING but talk about compulsive eating. This is the feature where messing up is just part of the act! No names required and Silly Aliases are AOK! Need ideas? See Day 54’s Resource of the Day for my page of ToonaCat Jokes

Catch up with Laurie

My Spreaker page. Please follow me there if you are on Spreaker.

My Instagram page at LaurieDreamWeaver

FaceBook Page if you want to sign up for our email list by clicking Tiger the Cat’s Sign-up button

Laurie on Tumblr

My page with instructions for all of the ways (so far) that you can send audio and lend your voice to this podcast.

New free way to leave voicemail http://speakpipe.com/laurieweaver You can also click the blue button on this page that says ‘send a voice message.’

Bravery Hotline

Leave your comments, questions, feelings and stories on Laurie’s podcast voicemail hotline – 206-350-6445.

Credits

Host: Laurie Weaver

Main Theme:I’m Letting Go by Josh Woodward from The Simple Life Part 1

I’m Letting Go (Josh Woodward) / CC BY 3.0

Resource of the day


The Mountains Are Calling…
is an awesome post about Brave Companion, Fionna’s experience hiking Yosemite on her blog, Little Food Lies. Check out the wonderful photos as well. Highly Recommended!
Comments box:

42 thoughts on “Ep 0068 – Depression and Always Feeling Responsible. I’ll Miss You Robin Williams

  1. Diane

    I made it! I am finally caught up!

    Thank you for mentioning me today! It made me feel special!

    I was listening to you read the comment I wrote on episode 28. When you read it today, I realized that there must have been a typo when I wrote it…. and yes I noticed it when I went back to look. I wrote that I had “a significant binge episodes”. I do a lot of voice typing and it should have read EIGHT significant binge episodes! And when I say significant, I mean off the chart, 5000 calories in a very short time!

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Ok Ms. Champion, I have changed your message on Day 28 as indicated. For the audio we shall just have to count it as one more lesson in combatting perfectionism 😉 I think I will design a certificate for listeners who catch all of the way up, as that is QUITE a bit of listening. Thanks too for all of your support and comments for me and the other brave companions on your way through.

      Reply
  2. Diane

    Also, to the private caller to the Bravery Hotline…. when you said you needed to stay out of your own head, I said YESSSSS out loud! Me too! And I am perimenopausel and my hormones are being a bitch right now! I understand!!

    Reply
    1. Dawny

      im looooost in my head RIGHT now, so I have to second.. or third.. or gallionth the notion.. get outta your head.. LOL

      Reply
  3. Fionna

    I’m so glad my words of encouragement about your singing had a positive impact on you, Laurie! I can’t wait to hear more of your song ideas. I’ll be listening for them on the podcast. And thank you for your kind words about my blog! Listening to episode 68 gave me the push I needed to update it for this week, and I finally gave you a long-overdue shout-out at littlefoodlies.blogspot.com. Now here’s me stepping out of my comfort zone: for you and all your listeners out there, my name is Fionna like “Madonna,” not Fiona like “Mona.” Having the guts to correct people on the pronunciation of my name is something I’ve struggled with. Thanks, Mom and Dad 😉

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Sorry about that Fionna. (Fee – on nuh?) I understand, my legal name is Laurette and my middle name starts with A so ALL through school, Dr. appointments etc. I have to explain I am LAURIE NOT Loretta. I’ll correct on Day 69 and give you a bravery report shout-out for the correction. Well done! Thanks too for the shout-out on your excellent blog. I super appreciate it 🙂
      PS, I’m so glad you love Josh’s song, I’m Letting Go, as much as I do. It tickles me so much that the ending talks about Puget Sound where I am from. When I was contemplating my show, I felt strongly the musical presence would be so important to the tone. I looked through http://freemusicarchive.org for a Creative Commons Licensed song that had instrumental as well as vocal, reviewed Zillions, and the moment I heard the opening of Josh’s song, I knew it was it. THEN after I’d edited in the opener that I always use, I listened to the rest, got my surprise and decided to use that phrase always as my end. I then wrote Josh about how much it would cost for an unlimited commercial license, as I would be heartbroken to change my song if I started to profit from the show. He wrote back that he would never charge me a penny, no matter how successful the show would ever become. That I had rights to use it. What a guy! I talk him and his music up at every opportunity. I love it!

      Reply
  4. Dawny

    I’m very inspired by this episode as always Laurie.
    It helps me feel ‘normal’ and think there’s hope
    I applaud the brave companions who’ve joined us and are calling in to express feeling need concern happiness motivation n inspiration as well.
    I’m struggling a bit mentally. Idk. I think I haven’t given up my ‘diet mentality ‘ and REALLY TRULY EMBRACED intuitive eating like I NEED and WANT to. I think I’m experiencing what you described. Not TRULY releasing the diet mentality and it leading to feelings of unsatisfaction. Maybe I need help and guidance on how to REALLY let it go. Let go of the fear of weight gain and really embrace intuitive eating. I WANT to sooooo bad but I’m as equally SOOOOO SCARED!! I’ve been doing intuitive eating in a sense. I do really well with waiting until I’m hungry to eat. The stopping at satiety part is ‘hit & miss’. It’s yummy n I have a hard time stopping. Not EVERYTIME. I’m getting a bit better at not making tooo much that I need to stop before it’s gone. That helps me.
    I don’t want to be scared anymore of regaining my weight and I want to release my obsession with food that’s been learned and driven by my journey of food deprivation and restriction
    I’m in total awe n inspired by you kauri as well as the other brave compAnions speaking about this

    Reply
    1. Dawny

      talking about Type-O’s…
      that’s Laurie.. ha ha

      Im reading a book right now, it’s SOOOO awesome and amazing, it’s really helping me SEE the HOW of intuitive eating, not just the ‘this is what it is’ kind of thing, but really good (in my opinion) insight as to HOW to MAKE it happen, ive been ‘binge’ reading in a sense, and it’s sure given me some ‘aha’ moments.. wowsa.. “how to have your cake and skinny jeans too” I think it’s called.. by Josie Spinardi

      Reply
      1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

        Dawny, it’s such a funny coincidence – because I am just NOW reading the sample of “How to Have Your Cake and Skinny Jeans too” on my kindle. I had downloaded it a few days ago. I think someone mentioned it on http://intuitiveeatingcommunity.org. I lurk there quite a bit, though I don’t post often as this forum is truly to support those who embrace intuitive eating as described in Evelyn Tribole’s book, I am about 90% there, but I also have ideas and experience that may not jive 100%. However, it is an AWESOME, supportive forum Dawny, so if you haven’t been there, go check it out. It may also help, Be sure to let me know your review of “How to Have Your Cake and Skinny Jeans too” – you can write it, or call the bravery hotline and tell your thoughts. As I’ve written to you before, I think where you are is a challenging place. You lost your weight through calorie (points) deprivation and your body is primed to rebound once it gets calories (at least that’s what happened to me). When I began my intuitive eating experience this time, my body was already years away and 50-60 pounds rebounded from my low weight, so it’s not piling on with the blinding speed that it has when I’ve tried in the past. Your natural weight may be higher than your WW weight. But it is also very important to be honest with yourself about how it feels if that weight starts to come back. I hope this book is a bridge for you – it sounds like it may be as it keeps lower weight as a goal along with intuitive eating. I’m still not sure if I want to read it all of the way yet, as my head space needs to not care about my weight AT ALL for awhile. HEDGE HEDGE HEDGE – That is MY place in MY journey. I send you positive vibes and place prayer rocks for you when I can, because I know just how much you want balance in your life and how tricky it may feel for you. Hugs, Hugs, Hugs. Just know, however you go about your journey, I will support you. I’m proud of you for exploring options and looking at how each makes you feel.

        Reply
        1. Dawny

          Thank you soooooooo much Laurie. You make me feel accepted and validated. So far the book is really good and I’m thinking you may be right about it being a bridge linking me to intuitive eating amidst my hybrid version of Weight Watchers. I think one of my mental emotions right now may be grieving the lack of food by not eating unless I’m hungry. Lol. Sad but true.
          The book doesn’t focus on weight?!? As much as your main thinking. It really focuses on emotions and feelings around food and eating. It’s seriously the guide book of how-to. The deeper into it I get the more n more I’m feeling rabbit like and wanna hop ALL in…….
          Thanks for all your unconditional support and encouragement

          Reply
    2. Diane

      Dawny…..

      I was listing to podcasts today and ramdomly listened to Heather Robertson”s Half Size Me and THERE YOU WERE!! I was so happy to hear your story!!!

      Reply
  5. RI

    Hi Laurie,

    I’m glad that you feel more comfortable with your weight and that you stopped feeling like a failure. Your struggles are so very human and I think that’s what is so special about your podcast–we can relate to you because you aren’t ‘better’ than us or more ‘successful.’ I’ve been struggling with my relationship to food and my body image for years, and it always seems like I’m on some uphill struggle. As soon as I get to a weight where I’m happy, I will obsess and admire myself for much too long, and I will inevitably self sabotage and eat to much soon after. Then, I feel like a failure, and I go on to eat more and more for days afterwards. It doesn’t’ make sense, but I feel like I’ve eaten too much to go to the gym. It will take me weeks to go to the gym and start eating healthy again after I fall off the wagon. I’ve repeated these cycles countless times, so that I’m always struggling and when I’m not struggling, I feel like something is missing!

    I found that hiking parallels my food issues. When I first started to hike, I would endure burning thighs, sweaty armpits and mosquito bites at the thought of the beautiful view from the top. Sometimes though, the view is obstructed by clouds, or there are too many visitors there, or there are bugs at the top too. Even though the goal turned out to be disappointing, I always felt calm, reflective and happier after the hikes. I realized then that it’s not about the view that motivates me, but the actual struggle itself. and the experience of hiking is mediative, not the serene quietness on top of the mountain. I feel like with my weight, I’m always hiking uphill, but I try to remind myself that it is the experience and not the image of the perfect body weight, or the peak at the top, that is going to bring me happiness. It is the NOW and that helps me to stay present.

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      I’m glad to see you Ms. Brice (Brave Rhode Island Companion Extraordinaire ) 😉

      I’ve repeated these cycles countless times, so that I’m always struggling and when I’m not struggling, I feel like something is missing!

      This comment struck me at once. At my current point in the road, the absence of my obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors around food and exercise AND the accompaning drama is leaving a HUGE gap in my time, day, thoughts. I’m like a robot whose hard drive brain has been wiped and tends to sit in corners with limp hanging arms awaiting a new programmer to come along. I think that was a trigger for me before to start up the cycle. That lull of peace and quiet was intolerable. Now I’m trying to use it to write again, to go to various meetups, like my writing group, the Voice Actors’ social group, to write down the lyrics of my silly made up songs I sing to cats, go to movies, take more hikes. It is AMAZING how much time I have to fill without the Robot Aliens in my head, or my need to tussle with them.

      Thanks too for your anaolgy about hiking and life. I find that true as well. I love hiking for its own sake now (unless the blazing hot sun is beating down, I’m so NOT a heat gal). IT has a rhythm that mimics the heart, I find. It is a great time to be alone with your thoughts and its intensity is doable, but requires me to be in the moment with my body. Just foot placement while hiking takes some attention that walking around the park doesn’t necessarily need. I find I really need to reconnect with my body and its needs, this is a primary way I do so.

      Thanks too for the encouragement, I did feel like a failure that day, and was sad and disappointed in myself. But I’m proud of myself that I told you all about it. After telling, I felt better. It does do wonders to actually SPEAK YOUR TRUTH out loud. I just got a new call on the bravery hotline from a BC who doesn’t want me to use the recording, but wanted to share her story. The relief that I could hear by the end of the call made me happy the bravery hotline exists as a tool for anyone who wants to have that experience of telling his or her truth out loud. And I thank you for your bravery in allowing your call to be heard on Day 64.

      Reply
      1. Dawny

        I totally relate to the gap in things without the constant battle. Tug of war. To eat or not to eat since trying to eat only when hungry. The lack of time used up on obsessing etc almost has me in a grieving state of the lack of eating going on. Scarazy. It’s weird having time to think about life and being more mindful and in the moment of everyday living.

        Reply
  6. Cheryl

    This was such a terrific episode, and I just want to say I think what you gave up today — worrying about what people think about your not having lost weight over the weeks of the podcast — is one of the biggest and bravest steps you’ve taken yet. You’re right. Your issues are YOUR issues. Ours (listeners) are OUR own. It’s being able to work those issues out side-by-side in company of like-minded companions rather than getting our emotions all mixed up with each other complicating things even further that is the healthy way for us to grow. We’re all at different places in our journeys as you pointed out, and that gives us wonderful opportunities to learn from each other.

    So yay for you! What a wonderful role model you’re turning out to be. Next time you feel like you’re not being what you think you should, I hope you go back and reread all the comments folks have left for you. In fact, make a collage with the comments, and some pictures, and some encouraging words, and hang it up where you’ll see it often. Let it be a big hug from all of us.

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hey Cheryl, sorry I’ve been tardy in my comment reply, but as I said in Day 69, so much of your comment resonated. This is one of the sentences I printed out and hung on my mirror to see in the morning.

      Your issues are YOUR issues. Ours (listeners) are OUR own. It’s being able to work those issues out side-by-side in company of like-minded companions rather than getting our emotions all mixed up with each other complicating things even further that is the healthy way for us to grow.

      Thank you, because this reinforces my own responsibility to myself and enhances my sense of freedom. Without wearing the whole world about my neck, I finally have strength to move and explore in directions that appeal to me.

      xoxoxoxo

      Reply
  7. Suz (Suzanne)

    Hi Laurie,
    Well here I am finally on episode 68.
    I started listening right about the time you were podcasting about being nervous that new listeners who are listening all the way from the beginning might be disappointed that when they caught up you hadn’t reached some big weight loss go or inner Nirvana.
    I feel bad if I were any part of laying those kinds of feelings or apparent expectations on you! I just wanted you to know that those ideas were no part of my thinking when I first started listening to the podcast. My excitement came from the feeling of “me too!” and that I had found a kindred spirit to listen to who was much more aware, articulate, and brave than I am on an issue that I think about (and that plagues me) daily.
    I wanted to witness the journey.
    I am more interested in thoughts and feelings and how they evolve and change in a person as they deal with something. As far as I can tell, you have come a long way! And in only a few months, you now have more skills and more successes than before. You have more and more incidences of checking in with your feelings before eating, you have more episodes of natural eating, you feel more satiety cues, you keep going and get back exercising and making progress even after painful bike accidents….it’s all these things about you that encourage and inspire me. Not just the weight loss. And I weigh much more than you do, so 206 or so sounds fantastic to me! And I love to hear that you are feeling good. That is my goal, too, feeling good.
    So know that where you have come so far is very impressive! If all I cared about was a successful Good HouseKeeping weight loss story, I’d have left long ago. I’m insterested in thoughts, feelings, psychology, resilience, genuineness, etc. You are a success just for keeping on trying and continuing to stay aware and take care of yourself. And you contribute to and enrich the lives of your listeners. Not many people have the ability, the know-how, the talent, the drive, or the courage to do what you are doing.
    I think you already worked out a reasonable response to your anxious feelings, but wanted to add my 2 cents. Especially for someone like me, who has been stuck and depressed for a long time, and feels completely overwhelmed and incapable of approaching a diet or making even much of a change at this point, your story is helpful to me.
    Thank you for taking all of us along!

    Also, I was amazed to have a shout-out this podcast! When I posted, I had just started listening, and I didn’t even know about, and didn’t even think that any of my message would be read in the podcast! Normally that would embarrass me, but I listened to so many other shoutouts along the way, I was okay with it.
    Thanks for your kind response.

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Oh Suz, it may be coincidence that you were listening right at that time. I was just working through my stuff, you know? Since I was ALREADY feeling the twinkle of body failure, I was tweaked by the hopeful comments of new listeners as well as the thoughts I letting through my positive acceptance guard. Most new listeners who start at day 1 get all excited because I lost 10-15 pounds fairly quickly and they hope I made my weight goal. That is a supportive nice hope. As you can tell from this one, I am USED to feeling I am disappointing people. That people think I’m good at something or that I’m nice and then they get to know me and BAM. So all of these thought come from years of self-doubt. It actually shows my progress that I shared these with you. Don’t think for a moment that you or anyone else triggered this. It was me triggering myself from events. (Isn’t that the way many of our triggers go?)

      But I do apologize for this.

      Also, I was amazed to have a shout-out this podcast! When I posted, I had just started listening, and I didn’t even know about, and didn’t even think that any of my message would be read in the podcast! Normally that would embarrass me, but I listened to so many other shoutouts along the way, I was okay with it.
      Thanks for your kind response.

      Usually I’m pretty good about asking permission, or just saying hello to new listeners. But in your case, I missed the boat. I’m glad you were okay with it, but I wished I had checked in with you first, as I understand how jarring that can feel to hear your story or voice unexpectedly.

      Hugs and thanks again for listening and for all of your thoughtful comments,

      Laurie

      Reply
          1. Suz (Suzanne)

            I’m sorry you’re having to deal with that! Sometimes when I listen I draw little scribbles….like I just drew a scribble of a little character kicking a small figure representing the Bully Voice into space.
            I am not good at speaking, so I doubt I’ll ever be on the bravery list, but I share more when I can type. Thinking of speaking, and then hearing my icky voice on an episode makes me queasy.
            But I love to share music on FB. If I can think of any good ones to add, maybe they could help brighten your day. I like funny songs as well as inspirational songs and soothing songs.
            I like to bead, too. I’m willing to make a “Brave” tiara or some pretty bracelets as a giveaway draw or something for your Coffee Clatch or whatever.
            Good luck with your uploads!!!

          2. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

            Hey Suz, do you have a way of scanning or snapping photo of your drawing and emailing it to me? I had in my head that I would like little drawings to go in the e-book I’m writing. Maybe we could collaborate? Or if not, we could at least have fun sharing our art back and forth safely. Let me know what you think, and don’t worry if it’s not your cup of tea. Something to consider for your voice someday, is calling for Foolish Fun. Helen JUST did with the best joke, it made me LOL! She used speakpipe since she is from England and the bravery hotline would cost the Earth for her. Just a thought, really. Just ways to be brave with baby steps. You also have some really great comments, so with your permission, I may chose some of those to read and feature once I’m back to recording vs. uploading. AND I love your idea of the drawing give aways for the coffee klatch. Since brave companions also seem to want a token, or tattoo, or some brave companion thing, it might be fun to design a product for sale. I’m not a jewelry designer, but there are many things that we can do to support each other’s dreams. Maybe some of these will spark your creativity? But remember, only do what is fun for you. I don’t ever want to be a chore on the todo list, not for listening, not for comments, not for making fun things 🙂

    2. Cheryl

      Hey, Suz! Just wanted to drop in here and mention something you said in your first post up there. You said, “I am more interested in thoughts and feelings and how they evolve and change in a person as they deal with something.”

      Ditto! I think the evolution of our thoughts and feelings is going to be the very thing that in the end leads us to a healthier lifestyle. And experiencing that journey with other people opens up so many possibilities for growth that we never dreamed of. So I am listening and learning, too. It’s nice to have you come alongside and join in the experience.

      Reply
      1. Suz

        Hi Cheryl!
        Ditto X 2!
        I’m very interested in the process. What good is knowing the result without the process that went along with it?
        Also, and this is unrelated to weight, but I think related to my personality. I am a person who likes slow movies that are all about character studies. In general, the world is a little too loud and too fast for me!
        I remember reading in Psych 101 about “augmenters” and “reducers.” I am definitely an augmenter. That is someone who feels things big…so even a small stimuli can be overwhelming. A reducer is more likely to be a thrill-seeker, a challenge-taker.
        I thought about this even in my college drawing class…I tended to focus in and draw things too big, so they ran off the paper. Reducers tend to draw things small so they are floating alone on the paper.
        I think people who have a problem with an obsession, or with sorting out their thoughts, tend to have a lot of mental noise going on a lot. I think Laurie is right to treat her walks as therapy, because just that physical activity helps to clear out some of the stress chemicals that complicate the mess in our heads!

        Reply
        1. Cheryl

          Interesting difference. I’m definitely not a thrill seeker, so that explains a lot about me, too. Thanks for posting that. My silly mind just NEVER seems to shut off. Even at night. Thought meditation might slow me down mentally, but it only does for the time I’m actually meditating. Got any tricks up your sleeve?

          Reply
          1. Suz

            I was hoping you might! Haha. All my attempts at mediation have been a bust. I am way too antsy and my mind is spinning too fast to be able sit and try to clear my mind. I’d rather walk or craft or play the piano.

  8. Suz (Suzanne)

    Yes, I have a scanner at home. I bought a drawing app for the iPad, but that is a little awkward to use, and I’d need to look into some tutorials to figure out how to use it!
    I think wasn’t quite clear…I meant a drawing as in, like a little lottery that members are entered in, and then a drawing is held and they could win a wrap bracelet or something. I don’t know if that’s a good idea or not.
    I’m not a professional artist, just a scribbler! But I’ll see what I can do.
    You can use any of my comments. I appreciate your telling me that my input is valuable!
    I would love it if you had a chance to look into that issue of will power, and will power fatigue, and about your amazing resilience, and what you think it takes to be resilient despite doubts and setbacks.

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      You were clear, I was doing my usual, in THAT CASE let’s see how much FURTHER we can run impulse … I’m very easily motivated to big dreams and ideas. I know you aren’t a professional artist, neither am I, which is why I think your scribbles might work well in my ebook about the voices in my head and what I say to them. I’m going to ponder your last question and use it as a topic in an episode. It’s very interesting. As to the bracelet idea, I get you meant make me one to give away. I went right to, hmmmmm, that may be COOL to make to sell also. No worries, I’m a bit ADHD and easily distracted by shiny ideas and creativity. But it’s like I brainstorm and not everything gets done. But it makes me happy to toss out ideas and have dreams and to see where they go. Does that make sense? Anyway, I’m procrastinating since talking to you is MORE fun than uploading old shows and teasing them. bye for now!

      Reply
  9. Suz (Suzanne)

    LOL! You are so much like my friend Vicki. She loves to brainstorm and has so many big ideas! And I’m usually the wet blanket by bringing up the “how” and the practicalities. Finally, she just said, jokingly, “Shut up!” And we laughed and laughed.
    I’m a bit ADHD too, so I know what you’re talking about.
    AND I am a big big big procrastinator. And perfectionist.
    I think the idea of something people could wear or carry with them or have up on the fridge is a good idea. A magnet, a keychain, a charm that could clip onto a shoelace or a bracelet, a decal, a coffee cup, a tote, something.
    That’s it, I won’t distract you from your task further!
    ~suz

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hmmm now my mind IS getting full of ideas!

      I think the idea of something people could wear or carry with them or have up on the fridge is a good idea. A magnet, a keychain, a charm that could clip onto a shoelace or a bracelet, a decal, a coffee cup, a tote, something.
      That’s it, I won’t distract you from your task further!

      I think I will play with these ideas a bit. It might be fun to figure a general logo and maybe have different people’s take on it, since we are a bit interactive around here. Hmmm, I’ll ponder some more. Thanks Suz!

      Reply
  10. Suz (Suzanne)

    I’m here on #68 for the second time, January 14, 2015.
    I have been really enjoying listening to everything again.
    It’s been beneficial to relisten for me and absorb more, and revisit some ideas.
    And, I feel like I’ve been able to understand and relax more with many of the concepts. Not only that, but I paid more attention to the wonderful words of other BCs, too, and have come to value and respect them even more. What a smart, kind, talented, amazing bunch of people! I am seriously impressed and encouraged that there are people like the BCs in the world. I wish I had friends nearby like them.
    And the reason I was prompted to put this on day 68 was that I hadn’t even remembered the first time through about Fionna’s message, and her mentioning your song from when you were 8! Maybe I was just overwhelmed the first time being mentioned and having my post read. But on this post, Fionna was new too, and she mentioned about your sweet song and how nice it was, and how you actually COULD sing. I had thought the same thing, which was why I played it. Fionna could certainly have done the same thing, so I hope I didn’t step on her toes.
    Just thought that was interesting. And I had forgotten that the seed of a Brave Companion song was first mentioned here, too. 🙂

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      I’m so glad you are having fun revisiting the shows. I sometimes forget that there have been a HUGE number of wonderful, talented kind BCs, yourself included, who have stopped by along the way. Your kind act of sending me my song was one of the best surprises of the show. Fionna’s rendition of the Brave Companion song was another. It is so fun for me to think I am sharing MUSIC with you both, ME, who could never sing out loud. I could dance, and plunk piano, but never did I feel musical. Both of you, and BC Sandy, and many others helped me change my wrong-headed thought that I couldn’t sing. And I’m so glad you all did and I gave it a try. It’s one of my favorite things now, to sing. I still sing the milk song for Gracie, but now I can hit the high note 🙂

      Reply
      1. Suz (Suzanne)

        Gracie loves her milk! 🙂
        I’m glad you get to sing, and love to sing now.
        And it wasn’t YOU who was “wrong-headed”, it was that darn teacher. She planted a poison seed, and now that weed is OUT of your garden.
        I just saw your latest post.
        I know enough about depression not to tell you to “cheer up.”
        I liked that you are noticing things like the squirrel that bring you into the moment and make you smile.
        That’s what I try to do, too. Notice my feeling, realize it’s something happening that might be due to the season or hormones or out-of-balance brain chemistry, and then breathe and ride it out. Refocus, be gentle. Visit a good thought or memory. Like Rocky and Bullwinkle!
        I loved watching reruns of that, and still love the voices from that show.
        Thanks for sharing the clip, I’ll watch it later this evening.

        Reply

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