Ep 0091 – Bonus – Buck Tradition! Our Thanksgiving by the Sea

Laurie in bike gear looking out at waves on a beach
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I gaze out at the waves during an early morning bike ride in Ventura. I’m very happy to be here and NOT out fighting for bargains on the day after Thanksgiving

Podcast Recap

The day after Thanksgiving I hit the bike path along the coast of Ventura to ponder my own Thanksgiving memories and to wonder, do we NEED to keep doing things the way we always have? Stéfanie from Quebec comments on Thanksgiving in Canada, Amy from WI has a great Thanksgiving and Cheryl’s hubby has a surprising victory on Turkey day.

Waves, sand, palm trees, path.

Looking at part of the bike path in Ventura in the early morning.

Waves crash along the beach on a sunny day with no clouds

Here is a close up view of the waves you can hear in Day 91’s episode.

Mark fastens bikes to the back of a red convertible on a sunny day by palm trees

Mark puts the bikes back on our red convertible. This car is my pride and joy, but since I retired it only comes out for road trips or to take company who want a true California experience for rides in our neighborhood.


Here you can find out ALL about American Thanksgiving Traditions and history thanks to the History Channel

My Thanksgiving blog post

Stéfanie from Quebec’s comment about Thanksgiving in Canada

Amy from WI’s wonderful Thanksgiving report

Cheryl’s report about her hubby’s Thanksgiving success

Intuitive Eating Book on Amazon – please use the links below

Intuitive Eating

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Host: Laurie Weaver
Main Theme:I’m Letting Go by Josh Woodward from The Simple Life Part 1

I’m Letting Go (Josh Woodward) / CC BY 3.0

Resource of the day

Christmas Salads.
on Allrecipes.com. Usually when we think of swapping holiday recipes, it involves cookies or dessert. I thought, why not see some great sounding salads? Just because I’m following intuitive eating doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy some great veggies and fruit tossed together with some delish ingredients. Do you have a favorite salad recipe? Send it to me and I’ll pass it on in one of my newsletters.
Comments box:

19 thoughts on “Ep 0091 – Bonus – Buck Tradition! Our Thanksgiving by the Sea

  1. Kerry

    Beautiful pictures! Looks and sounds like a lovely Thanksgiving! I hear you about the desire to buck tradition. All holidays trigger anxiety for me…family gatherings are extremely food centered, and they all take place at my parents’ home where my eating disorder first reared its ugly head. Our Thanksgivings are filled with mixed messages of “Are you sure you want to eat that?” to “One piece won’t kill you.” I didn’t have a fantastic day…anxiety and boredom led me to graze throughout the day. Small success on day 2, in which we returned to my parents’ house for leftovers—I had seconds of the stuffing and potatoes, but was too full for pie, so I skipped it. Lots of conversation around the table about getting back on the wagon tomorrow!
    I avoid anything having to do with Black Friday. I think it’s terrible that stores are opening up on Thanksgiving Day—takes away from the whole point of Thanksgiving, which *I think* is to reflect on what we have, NOT to consume, consume, consume!

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Oh the family mixed messages! What a painful poison dart that is. I too think it was tough whenever I was in my family home during the holidays. a lot of that for me was it made me zoom right back into my little kid mode vs. full on adult mode. I believe it is somewhat hard for parents of grown kids too. I don’t know this one, as I don’t have children of my own, but I DO know I’m guilty of the dreaded surprise that my niece and nephew have somehow grown up into young adults. Hooray for skipping the pie because you were full and knew it vs. thinking “you shouldn’t have it”. You get to decide what you eat or don’t eat. And after years of letting external influences have more sway than our own wants and needs, it can be tricky to get in touch with what you want (foodwise and otherwise) and then it takes practice to act on it. I don’t believe in wagons anymore, though I surely have had my share of jumping on and leaping off of them in the past. What I do believe, is that every moment in your life, every single moment, you have the choice to behave in a way that gets you closer or further from your own goals, dreams and desires. Example: I want a life free of fear of food. After a binge. I can. 1. Berate myself 2. Decide to Overexercise to “make up for it” 3. Decide to Starve myself for a few days to “make up for it” 4. Decide to eat even more as punishment 5. decide to do some or all of the above. 6. Decide to be gentle on myself. 7. Decide to give myself love in some way. Bath, change into clothes that feel better, listen to lovely music as I lay down for a few minutes. 8. Decide to allow myself space to discover the cause of the binge. And every single moment I can choose again. And again. So in the case of the family dinners, I breathe and ask myself what do I want to eat? Then when they say anything to me, I say, I love you and I manage my own eating thanks. Wow, isn’t this potato delicious? How about them Seahawks? It sounds silly, but I practice in the mirror about 5 replies to all old messages and then stick to them. It really does help. Hugs again for getting through and coming here to post. Remember you can put yourself on the bravery report ANY TIME you do something brave. Doesn’t have to be big. xoxoxoxox

  2. Sue

    Interesting observations about traditions and the benefits of ringing the changes. In the UK we don’t have anything that is like your Thanksgiving. Christmas is the time that families tend to gather together. This is the first year that my siblings and I won’t be at my parents. Time for us to establish our own way of doing things.

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hi Sue, it is interesting that you don’t have to face the national “Stuff yourself day” in the UK. It is a great meal and time to connect here in the USA, but it IS also very tough for those of us with eating and/or family issues. And I’ll be interested to hear how your Christmas holidays go. It is always a shock to turn that wheel from celebrating traditions in the old family home to something new. I hope you and your siblings come up with new traditions that will help you connect without the pressure that can sometimes build during these times. Hugs to you and yours. xoxoxoxox

  3. Cheryl

    Listening to your podcast brought back so many memories for me. There was always the gaggle of gals in the kitchen and the daring dudes in front of the TV. I don’t remember doing a lot of overeating of any one thing in particular, but even if you just took a spoonful of everything that folks brought, you probably packed in over 3000 calories! The best thing I remember about those growing up years is that there was always room around the table for anyone who happened by. We never feared not having enough to go around because it wasn’t all about the food and we didn’t cram it in.

    After my folks passed, my sister and I traded off years. If I had Thanksgiving, she had Christmas, etc. But I’m a crappy cook for the most part (beside which I just plain hate cooking), so it’s always been his lordship who deals with the bird. If I handle it, I can’t eat it. (Same with chicken. Been that way ever since I was pregnant.)

    Now that all our kids are grown, my sister spends her holidays with her kids, and it’s pretty much just HL, me, and (at present) our son, as our daughter lives in Maryland. So it was very quiet here this year. I got a LOT of reading done. Reread “Outlander” by Diana Gabaldon.

    But we do have one Thanksgiving tradition we observe that doesn’t involve food. After dinner, but before dessert, we always watch Chevy Chase’s “Christmas Vacation.” Been doing that for nearly 20 yeas now. I miss the times when the cousins would all snuggle up together on the floor (even in their 20’s) to watch it. It’s too bad some things can’t always stay the same.

    Tell you what, though. I think HL and I would have LOVED to have been there with you by the ocean! Sigh with longing…

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      You know Cheryl, I don’t think I did a lot of overeating on Thanksgiving as a youngster either. Too dang busy moving food and empty bowls back and forth to the kitchen. And Hooray that you have his Lordship and I have the wonderful Mark to cook the dinner! These are two special guys to do that.

      That is so cool that you watch Chevy Chase to start the Christmas holiday season. Well maybe some year we will have a BC meet up in Ventura for Thanksgiving. I recommend it. Nice biking, walking, and a pretty care free dinner. Only problem is there is no guarantee that the weather would be as great as it was for us this year, or stormy, as it is now. I would hate for folks to come to CA and get treated to THIS weather. For us, being just an hour away, no biggie one way or another. In fact, kind of different and fun to watch the storm over the waves. Reminds me of home. We did move up our travel day by one this week so as not to drive in the downpour. So I’m a bit off in my writing and recording schedule. But oh well, at least I AM learning better to go with the flow. Hugs Hugs Hugs and cool you got your reading in. I’m reading the tales of the Arabian Nights, part 1 for book club. Interesting to read stories from so long ago.

  4. Vena

    I found you on stitcher. I love the holidays, but hate the overeating. It’s feels terrible when my husband and children are thin and they don’t have an eating problem they don’t understand why I can’t lose weight and can’t control myself. Growing up every one in my family had an eating problem. I feel like an outsider and an incredible failure. Every single day I try to conquer it some days are good,but most days bad. Everyday I feel horrible.

    1. Cheryl

      Hi, Vena!

      Boy do I hear you. I think everyone here is or has been in that same situation. I wish I could just sit down and enjoy the holiday treats without having to feel guilty. It’s such a struggle. Especially when families are naturally thin. I can tell you, it’s the same, though, when they’re not. My hubby is pretty good size, too. So we soldier on through this quagmire together.

      Glad you stumbled across our little “village” here. Hope to get to know you better.

    2. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hi Vena, Welcome! I’m so glad you found us here. I’m sorry your family cannot understand your struggle and your feelings. That’s tough to not feel understood in such an important way. The good news is WE UNDERSTAND! Boy, was I surprised when I started my show that so many other people from all over the world, and ALL SHAPES AND SIZES understand. Having issues with eating runs the gamut and many, many of the feelings cross all boundaries. I’m so glad you found us, and feel free to post your feelings, thoughts, ask for support, give support, laugh, cry. We support you however you feel and are happy to welcome a new Brave Companion. hugs xoxoxoxox

    3. Stéfanie

      Hi Vena! Welcome to the community! Here girl, you are an insider! I hope we can support you during your rough times… Stéfanie xx

      1. Vena

        I’m so glad I found ya’ll. Right now I’m gonna concentrate on decorating and bingeing on episodes. I have been going to the gym September. I got a trainer. But I haven’t lost weight. My trainer says I need to eat every three hours something small. But I would rather not hardly eat at all so I wouldn’t lose control. When I lose control half the time I purge. I really need to lose weight because I need to reverse some health issues. I really wish I can conquer this.

        1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

          Hello again Vena! Even though I’m not actively trying to lose weight any longer, I remember my days of weight lifting and gym training. In a way it was interesting and fun to challenge myself, but for me, I ended up not liking that form of exercise as much as what I do these days. Do you enjoy the program the trainer has you on outside of the diet recommendations? Some people thrive doing these things and it helps them see food as fuel for their workouts. Right now, I’m in therapy to help me work through my eating issues as well as other issues (though I’m finding them to be one and the same, pretty much 😉 ) Have you ever been in therapy to get support? It might help you sort some of this out and give another layer where you won’t feel alone on this journey. Hugs and I think you deserve to put yourself on the bravery report for telling us your truth about your eating issues. Hugs

          1. Vena

            In truth I really loved swimming and swam every day when weather was warm. I live in south Texas so was able to swim in Oct. I hate exercising. Much rather hike. There are some nice trails,but having irritable bowel syndrome it very inconvenient. I will try to find gastrointestinal dr. To help me with my ibs.

          2. Cheryl

            HI Vena… I struggle with IBS, too. I have found that smaller meals help a lot. So maybe give it a try as your trainer said. I know it makes a huge difference for me.

          3. Vena

            Thanks Sue and Cheryl I’ll take your advice. Is there anything else that you find helps your ibs? If you have other advice I would greatly appreciate it. : )

          4. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

            Wow Vena, I’m sorry to hear about the IBS. That’s one I don’t have experience with but I surely understand how that would make it much harder to comfortably go for long activities outside. I think your plan to have some medical help is great. I’m hoping that you can find a way to get onto the trails. In your area, I’m betting you can be outside for quite a bit of the year as we can here. I like swimming too and jump into pools and water at every opportunity. I feel so graceful in the water. My favorite activity of all time is snorkeling in Hawaii and watching the sea turtles and the tropical fish. It is my slice of heaven. Whenever we are so lucky as to travel there, we book snorkel boat tours almost every day and swim on our own from the beach besides. LOVE to watch my sea creature buds in their natural environment. Sigh. Making myself Hawaii-sick. Maybe next year. Hugs and good wishes xoxoxoxox

  5. Sue

    Hi Vena, I’m so glad you found us. Feel at peace to try whichever suggestions sound appealing to you. Right now I am aiming for a better relationship with food rather than dieting, observing my food choices rather than judging them. Most of the time I feel yuk and wish I had the energy to move more. It’s great you enjoy hiking and swimming. I wonder if thinking about it as moving in such a way that my body feels better and enjoying the outdoor environment would sound so much more attractive than that swearword “exercise”.


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