Ep 0093 – New Beginnings and a Stormy Music Day with Fionna

Laurie in purple leaning on her hand under the covered picnic table at the park where she hikes
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I run up to the covered picnic area of the mountain where I usually hike the MINUTE Mark and I pull into our driveway ahead of the storm coming back from Ventura. I’m ready to give recording day 93 my best shot in the face of growing wind.

Podcast Recap

I record just ahead of a storm and in the spirit of new beginnings I let go of the weird idea I can control the past. Thank you to new supporters of the show with cups of coffee and Amazon. If you are in the USA, Canada or the UK, please support the show by doing your holiday shopping via the show’s Amazon links. Want a daily dose of bravery? Follow my dedicated bravery saying Twitter account, TheBraveryCoach. We celebrate Stéfanie from Quebec, Amy from WI and Dawny’s warm welcomes to our NEW Brave Companions from last show, Vena from Texas, Fernando from Brazil and Shell from Wales. Welcome to Cassie, our newest brave companion, who goes on the bravery report for posting her first public comment on one of my blog posts. There’s a brand new feature on Compulsive Overeating Diary, the blog and show inspired by Dawny’s very brave request. Even MORE touching and exciting bravery as Marquita overcomes her fear to tell us via Speakpipe her own experiences with legalizing trigger food. We feature a wonderful song called Brave and Free written and sung by our very own Brave Companion, Fionna Lane, who will also share in her own words, the brave steps she took in order to write it. We announce an upcoming song we are going to co-write and ask for your help.

Covered picnic table

This is where I actually recorded day 93.

Laurie in front of a small winery

Here’s a quick view of the little winery in Deukmejian Wilderness Park where I usually hike.

Tiger on Laurie's lap with a view of the rainy patio behind.

Tiger is disturbed by hearing the wind and pounding rain as we edit. This is what I escaped by minutes while recording.


The episode about current past lives

The Blog Post about ‘What do you really want?’

Blog post about Selfies, aging, and self-acceptance

My Bravery account on Twitter, TheBraveryCoach

Shell’s successful comment on day 92

Stéfanie’s welcome to new BCs on day 92

Amy from WI’s welcome to Shell

Dawny’s welcome to new BCs

Cassie’s first public post and our comment conversation on my Selfie blog post

The new feature called ‘Advice Wanted’

Dawny’s brave letter and request on Advice Wanted

If you need professional help, here is a link to the NEDA find treatment page

The episode about legalizing chips that inspired Marquita’s brave speakpipe segment

February Album Writing Month – Fionna’s Album

Fionna’s Blog, Fionna Sings

Alen Standish’s blog and show, Progress, Not Perfection

Want to have Fun Being Foolish too?

Participate in our feature called “Foolish Fun“. Just call the bravery hotline 206-350-6445 or check out the send audio page on http://www.compulsiveovereatingdiary.com/how-to-send-audio/
And tell us a joke, riddle, a silly story, limerick, sing a song, play a kazoo, ANYTHING but talk about compulsive eating. This is the feature where messing up is just part of the act! No names required and Silly Aliases are AOK! Need ideas? See Day 54’s Resource of the Day for my page of ToonaCat Jokes
Intuitive Eating Book on Amazon – please use the links below

Intuitive Eating

Ways to support the show financially

Catch up with Laurie

My Spreaker page. Please follow me there if you are on Spreaker.

My Instagram page at LaurieDreamWeaver

FaceBook Page if you want to sign up for our email list by clicking Tiger the Cat’s Sign-up button

My Second Twitter Account JUST for bravery sayings @TheBraveryCoach

Laurie on Tumblr

My page with instructions for all of the ways (so far) that you can send audio and lend your voice to this podcast.

New free way to leave voicemail http://speakpipe.com/laurieweaver You can also click the blue button on this page that says ‘send a voice message.’

Bravery Hotline

Leave your comments, questions, feelings and stories on Laurie’s podcast voicemail hotline – 206-350-6445.


Host: Laurie Weaver
Featured Song: The Brave and Free written and performed by Fionna Lane

Main Theme:I’m Letting Go by Josh Woodward from The Simple Life Part 1

I’m Letting Go (Josh Woodward) / CC BY 3.0

Resource of the day

Episode 024 Lapses and Relapse.
on the podcast and blog, Let’s Reverse Obesity by John Bukenas. I think this is a stellar example of 1. yes, men have this issue too, and 2. it’s never too late to be real and try again. Hooray for John! Please give a listen and see if John’s show will be of help to you and if so, give him a shout-out of support.
Comments box:

16 thoughts on “Ep 0093 – New Beginnings and a Stormy Music Day with Fionna

  1. Cassie

    Laurie, and other Brave Companions, I’m inspired and humbled by what I heard from all of you in this episode. How truly courageous and talented and loving you all are. I’m proud to have been welcomed into such an incredible group. Thank you all!
    P.S. The kids (twenty-somethings) I work with would have shortened my previous comments

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      LOL Cassie, I’m sure glad you know what the 20 somethings are saying, I need a translator 😉 But thanks for your comments and support. I too was BLOWN away by all of the bravery this episode. Dawny being so vulnerable with her letter, Marquita wrestling with feeling her audio file was too rambling or not clear – and yet it was awesome, and Fionna’s wonderful talent with singing and songwriting are a testament to what we can do when we dare, and that we can find others on our paths who enjoy our thoughts and talents too. It is a very strange thought for some of us who have been so hidden behind masks and isolated out of fear, the BCs like us as we truly are. I’m so glad you found us, dear Cassie and you DESERVED your mention on the bravery report. xoxox0

      1. Cassie

        Thanks Laurie. Having a rough time as always during the holidays, but I’m so grateful I have backup this time. It’s very comforting to not feel so alone.

  2. Dawny

    Another marvelous debut laurie!! U NEVER disappoint. I love my Wog-a-bouts with you. Lol.

    Oh my the singing!!! LOVELY! I hit rewind and re listened. BEAUTIFUL song. WOWSA

    Thanks for helping me reach out for support & input Laurie. It will be greatly appreciated. It always helps me to hear my ‘tale’ from the outside in too as I have a different perception as if it were someone else that I don’t get when its in my head. Lol. I get lost in my weigh… Er Uh well I mean way. Lol. DOH.

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hooray Dawny! I hope your bravery generates some support for you, but even if not, I think having your story out there will be super valuable for others to hear as these feelings are pretty common and yet we all tend to think it’s only that WE aren’t doing things good enough/working hard enough. I also know what you mean about the ‘outside hearing’ of your words. Even when I read my OWN comments on the show, it sounds really different to me from when I wrote in my head. And I’m glad, glad, glad, that you loved Fionna’s song too. I am AMAZED she wrote 14 songs in 18 days and they are such good ones. Hugs dear Dawny, I’m so happy to go with you on your Wog-a-bouts. 🙂

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Thanks sooooo much for saying you love my selfies Vena! Believe me several can get deleted in pursuit of finding one I can tolerate on my prickly days. There are good days when I can take whatever comes and stay balanced, and other days (the prickly kind) where I feel jumpy and self-critical, weepy and everything can set me off on a feeling of non-perfection (nor even adequate) tangent that blows me out of the water. That is one reason why I usually post a selfie as part of my diary. Sometimes I really enjoy the photos. Especially some that are “arty” by accident. My very first selfie, the hiking photo of me looking at the sky was done by accident. I also liked one where the sun kind of sent a halo effect across it. But it is hard to see what I may look like to the camera some days. In my mind I am MUCH younger, more slender, and my skin is much better. But one good effect of all of these selfies is I’m growing to accept and love the skin I’m actually in. It’s been about 10 months now, and I’m just starting to not wince at selfies I consider “not my best” and to let them stand. I used to just not post any selfie if I felt it was too bad. Now I just post the best of the bunch and move on. In other words, don’t feel badly that you don’t like photos of yourself yet. You might try starting with a mirror and say neutral things to yourself. Such as my eyes are hazel (mine are) or I’m a lady. I have two arms. I can wink. I can smile. Stuff like that, then move on to things you like. For example. I like how my eyes sparkle when I’m happy. I like the dimple that looks like my dad’s. I like the way my hair curls over my shoulders. That builds you some tolerance for seeing yourself when you have been used to being self-critical. The other part that is weird, is that no matter how badly we think we look in our photos, to our loved ones, since they see us, the photos are not shocking. There can be more flattering and less flattering angles and light to any photo of anyone – including super models, but overall, to our loved ones, photos are just a reminder to them of us. It is sad to think of all the moments I refused to document in my past because I didn’t want to look fat. To my family and friends, I just looked like me. Thanks for the encouragement again Vena! Happy holidays xoxoxoxoxoxox

  3. Suz (Suzanne)

    I have to say that I have been so uplifted by your podcasts, Laurie. And I am so delighted and impressed by the wonderful talents and kindness of the BCs! It’s just a wonderful thing to come here and be a part of this group. I’ve been so busy lately I haven’t been able to spend as much time here as I’ve wanted to. But I listen to the podcasts during my commute to and from work. It gets my mind going, and right away I think of things I want to write on the blog about, but then I get to work and I have to…work. Then the same thing on the way home, but then I have to teach piano or do some other task!
    But wanted to say I’ve been listening, and want to catch up on some of the reading. I get a lot out of the podcast and the contributions of the great BCs.
    Exciting about writing a song!!! As much as I’ve always loved music, I don’t think an original song ever rolled around in my mind. I am fascinated and impressed when people can write their very own songs!
    On a quick break now…back to work!
    Still meaning to write more….and time keeps slipping away from me. 🙂
    So much to think about!

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Ahhh Suzanne, thanks SO much for stopping by. I thought Fionna did an awesome job singing and writing and was brave to share her story too. Man, 14 songs in 18 days, that’s something I surely could not imagine. Don’t stress dear Suz, I know you will stop by when you can, and your comments are always so thoughtful and interesting to read. Right now, I’m trying to record me singing Winter Wonderland – my singing teacher gave me a version in my key and if I can get a take, I’ll put it in the next show or two near the holiday. If your technical glitches work out, maybe you’d like to play a holiday song also? We could be a mini-holiday special. But if too busy or no time, no biggie. Always thinking of you and wishing you very well. Happy Holidays

      1. Suz (Suzanne)

        Yes! My range extender is now working. I can use the ipad again. I’d like to maybe play Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas. It’s sweet, and melancholy. And even though it talks about letting your heart be light, it makes you feel all nostalgic and verklempt. And I think of that scene from “Meet Me in St. Louis” where Judy Garland is singing it to little Margaret O’Brien, who, when she cries, can just break your heart in two.

        1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

          Hooray! That is AWESOME. I love that song and it is perfect. PS, I fixed the typo. Dang auto spell checkers and other atrocities of modern life. hah! Can’t wait to hear the music and this will make a nice little segment for the holidays. I love that our show is morphing into fun and bravery and not just the eating issues. The more I go through this journey, the more I think it is all tied together, and this being brave, as you are being here, and having fun as a community is the OPPOSITE of being in our compulsive, critical, isolating brains. When we are having these fun and open times, I am not thinking of food. I am thinking of you. And I think connection with people who I can be myself with is the major ingredient of my recovery. Hugs and thanks and xoxoxoxoxoxox

  4. Stéfanie

    Hi Laurie and BC’s!
    welcome to our group Cassie!
    It’s a beautiful song Fionna, and you have a beautiful voice too 🙂

      1. Vena

        Hi, Bc’s! Love our group of ever growing bc’s. Has anyone read 10 mindful minutes by Goldie Hawn? I mostly listen to audio books because I fall asleep when I read. I listen to it awhile back but didn’t get to the to finish it i had it downloaded. But I lost it some how. So I’m ordering a new one. It’s teaches you ways to reduce stress and explains how the brain works and how to teach children live happy lives. I thought it was a good book. I need to re-listen to it again. I need to refresh my mindfulness.


        1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

          Hi Vena, thanks SO MUCH for the book tip. I had never heard of Goldie Hawn’s work in this area, and went to check it out. Fascinating stuff and goes right along with what I have been discovering about changing attitude to find the positive and slowing down to appreciate moments. I’m putting it on my “To Read” list for sure.
          Hugs xoxoxoxoxox


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