Mark and me on an early morning bike ride in Ventura. Even by the ocean, it was HOT HOT HOT! This was taken right before I headed off to explore the urgent care options around Ventura – thanks to my guts.
You gotta have guts to say good-bye!
In English, having guts is the same thing as having courage or balls or cojones (I guess we got that one from Spanish, but I digress). Guts are also a euphemism for our digestive process. Gut troubles can be tummy/colon related OR lack of courage.
In the last several days since day 120 went live, I’ve had reason to think about my guts every which way but loose!
It was hard to let my show go. Really hard. It took a toll I think.
Day 120 took me so much time to process, both emotionally and literally. That sucker turned out to be over 2 and a half hours long! Wow, that’s a butt load (sorry for all of my behind analogies, but you will soon discover, that behind is on my mind) of writing, editing and recording. Never mind the emotional stones it took to actually press the publish button for the last time to send my little show live. I felt shaky, sick, proud, barfy, quivery… you name it, I felt it. How would the BCs react? Would they comment? Would they like it? Was it too much about me and my voice over stuff? Would the writers who volunteered to read their work be a good thing or something to scrub through? Would everyone be as excited as me to hear BC Dave’s writing performed by professional voice talent? Would they love Fionna’s song as much as me? Was I a success as BC Dave said in his bravery hotline message? Or was I just another fat middle aged woman who had given up?
I have to give Dawny props, because SHE was posting her love for the last episode early the next morning. Wow! I released it in the evening, and she had time to listen to the long-ass sucker and post by 8:00AM! Alen Standish too was on last show alert. He texted me the next day with his enjoyment. When queried about how the heck a busy guy such as himself could hear the whole thing so soon, he replied he’d used it on one of his scheduled long runs to pass the time.
I’ve heard from a few more BCs, including Fionna, Suz, Dave and our newest BC, Petra. So I’m happy with that. But I’ve also watched the steady drop off of FB likes as people are actually unliking the show page and reduction in show downloads and blog visits. Even though it was expected, I have to admit to feeling a bit blue with this outward proof that my show, as it was anyway, was over.
Mark and I went to the salon soon after. Nothing cheers you up like looking your best! It felt weird to do things without having to record them – so for old time’s sake I did record this fun moment on my phone.
Here’s the video I posted to Instagram.
BTW, follow me on Instagram at LaurieDreamWeaver if you’d like to see what we are up to. I don’t post all of the time, but a photo or two will usually make it there before it goes to any other communication.
Something Feels Off…
Now, my digestive system has never been quick. But it’s always chugged along pretty well no matter what I fed it. But it seemed, ever since the last show went live, to get slower and slower and slower, until things really ground to a complete and total stop. I wasn’t too worried at first, as I said, me and my guts have never been speedy Gonzales – but as time went on, I began to wonder about what I was eating to cause this?
Different approaches, different amounts, different types of food – my intro to Prune Juice -YUK
Mark and I decided to go up to Ventura to have some fun and take some long rides. Usually, exercise does wonders for my emotions AND my digestion.
We got there, rode over to our favorite restaurant, and I wasn’t hungry and couldn’t eat much – despite a very light eating day.
Then the next day Mark and I went for a long bike ride, and I noticed that things were REALLY at a halt and I wasn’t comfortable at all. Worried now, we found a great urgent care to investigate.
Many ways to spell relief
I wasn’t in a hurry to go to a Dr. partly, because it is super embarrassing AND I didn’t want to fight the scale fight. What might I weigh NOW packed to the gills with digestive troubles. Nope, didn’t want to see that number. No worries though, the nurse didn’t blink an eye when I requested the number be kept from me. Very nice about it. Dr. too, nice. Visions of tests and uncomfortable exams filled my poor brain while Mark kicked his heels outside in the waiting room.
No worries, the Dr. took my history, listened all around poor guts with her stethescope and found me worthy to just do over the counter remedies – aggressively. She was so kind she even typed out a 3 step plan for me HERSELF! This was all news to me, because I have never even had a laxative outside of surgery prep in my life. Let alone the full on battery of what was ahead. Also new, a diet comprised of only grapes and the aforementioned prune juice. OMG, what misery! Poor grapes, once my favorite fruit are now relegated behind broccoli and turnips in my desire to eat them. Armed with the plan, and her instructions to go to the pharmacy and start at once, Mark and I cut short our trip, and hit the drugstore on the way home.
No more details for you thank God!
Let’s just say I’ve had better days.
What else has been going on?
Let’s leave the adventures in digestion to revisit some cool stuff.
First, Here’s a video of my latest toy for my sound studio space. What makes this great is I can locate the computer now behind the sound blankets and remove more excess noise from my takes at the mic. Always a good thing. Here check it out.
First finished demo segment
Another exciting moment. David sent me the first completed segment for my demo. Now this is longer as a stand alone than it will be edited into the rest, but it was still pretty cool to hear it. Imagine this one is for an online explainer video on a company intranet.
Thanks for staying in touch Suz xoxox
Something Suz posted stuck with me. (I promise no more “behind” jokes either)
It does sound more and more though like you’re focusing on what you really want to DO instead of what you’d like to weigh or look like. So that’s positive.
I realized even going through this tummy misery, that my life IS about what Mark and I can do. I felt crummy, but not because I felt fat. And I DID feel HUGE with a tummy that would out-Buddha Budda, but mostly, I wanted to feel better in my body to get back to my “regular” life. (ok, ONE last joke, couldn’t resist). I wanted to record. I wanted to hike, I wanted to even clean my dusty house of horrors. I didn’t worry what I looked like really. And I look very, very fluffy right now. But I know it’s temporary. I feel no urge to diet. I do feel like exercising as I can, and making sure I take care of myself nutritionally. But food is the stuff that gives me energy. Things are moving along, in more ways than one.
Please stay in touch too!
And as BC Dave has said and written, Once a BC ALWAYS a BC. So what have YOU been up to since last I recorded? Ever had these evil gut issues? Hope not. I hope you’ve got guts in all of the good ways and can stay far, far away from the prune juice. Post away, I want to know about your life, because whether I say it or type it,I really, really, really, REALLY, really, really, care.