Ep 0112 – Waiting For To Go

Shot looking at the mountain and sky from below Laurie's chin. She's wearing sun glasses and her hiking hat.
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Me being arty with my shots again. Glad I didn’t have to photoshop anything out of my nose! It’s a cloudy day, but not too windy on the way up the mountain.

Podcast Recap

I recover my Zen on the mountain. Waiting is on my mind. We welcome our newest BC, Jill from the UK. Featured comments to her from moi, Dawny and Sue from the UK. Dawny Jumps right into our new Tricks and Tips feature with a great tip for those who enjoy their mocha java. Carol from Detroit sends in her kiwi tip via email. Mark’s touching comment for BC Dave, who shared his truth via the bravery hotline last show. Some great bike jokes sent in by Dave for today’s Foolish Fun. The story of my ironic descent from Zen and how I got it back – including me reading one of my errant blog posts.

Grey puffy clouds over the foothills in the distance.

Here’s the cloudy view from halfway up the trail. Pretty cool.

Stack of white rocks along the hiking trail.

Here I discover someone’s prayer rocks along the trail. I stop to send them positive thoughts and move on encouraged.


Carol from Detroit’s Kiwi Tip Example

The Last show, Day 111 where you can read Mark’s comment or support BC Dave.

Who are the Brave Companions – where you can read Dave’s story

The Bravery Report – where you can read new BC Jill from the UK’s story and welcome her

The Bicycle Status post where Dave shared his great Bike Jokes

The ERRANT Blog post that I read at the end of the show

Ways to support the show financially


Host: Laurie Weaver
Laurie’s Foolish Fun Intro Announcer: Mark Weaver
Laurie’s Foolish Funner: Laurie reading jokes sent in by Dave
Laurie’s Tips and Tricks Announcer: Mark Weaver
Laurie’s Tips and Tricks Content: Dawny and Laurie reading a tip from Carol from Detroit

Main Theme: I’m Letting Go by Josh Woodward from The Simple Life Part 1 Used by permission of Josh Woodward under a Creative Commons License

Sounds used in Laurie’s Foolish Fun Intro

  • Slide Whistle sounds
  • Background Tune/Beat
  • Girl’s Laughter
  • Phone Ring

Other Sounds

  • Crowd Cheering
  • Joke Rim Shot

Tips and Tricks Sounds

  • Tips Music
  • Harp
  • Guitar
Comments box:

13 thoughts on “Ep 0112 – Waiting For To Go

  1. Jill

    Fame at last!! How serendipitous that the very first podcast I listen to ‘live’ as in immediately as it’s released is the one where you talk about ME! And Laurie..I think about commenting so often, I hear things you say and nod my head and agree and make a mental note to go online and tell you how great it was…and then life happens. But, I am up to date with all the podcasts/blog posts, I am still working on my Intuitive Eating, and I feel making progress, although I know it will be slow. And – I checked out the photo of you and Tiger being happy, and I saw none of those negative things (Until you mentioned them, then I had to scroll back up and check “is your hair a mess? Does your skin look bad? 🙂 (No and NO! ), I just saw how happy you looked. Note to self, stop hating pictures of myself and capture the moments.

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hi Jill, serendipitous indeed! I’m glad you were able to hear your welcome without having to grit your teeth and jump ahead as many do. Intuitive eating had been such a learning experience I’ve extended it to other areas – like Intuitive picture taking. I try not to judge my photos anymore by the negative talk, but by how much I was enjoying a moment. That way my friends and family (who see me all of the time and are NOT surprised by what I look like) don’t miss out on having photos of me anymore in our fun times. That way I also focus on joy and not negativity. Now, I don’t mean that if I take 3 selfies for the show and 2 look WORSE than the third, that I don’t choose the one I perceive as most flattering. But sometimes I DO choose the not so flattering one IF it captures my feeling better. I hope this makes sense. I try to remember and capture feelings more than looks. xoxoxoxoxoxox

  2. dawny

    I have not gotten to the episode yet, but I know you are TOOO harder on yourself Laurie, as we compulsive folk tend to be.. Im on the bus too,

    things have been changing for me.. mentally.. im having all these ‘aha’ moments, and it’s all stuff that is in now way ‘new’ to me, but it’s ‘new to me today’, whatever works eh?

    I want to.. wait.. NO MORE I WANT TO.. I AM living in the moment more, enjoying LIFE & the journey.. everyday is a new opportunity.. and im seizing it =-)

    Every eating experience is a new opportunity to LOVE MY FOOD (since I don’t love eating.. yes new mind-set).. and when that eating experience is complete, life continues until the next.. having a ‘plan’ and ‘go to’ foods/meals/snacks etc is great, but obsessing, fretting is not so great, and im moving on to LIFE and being PRESENT in LIFE =-)

    Thanks friends.. for everything

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Dawny gal, my NEW mantra! Well done! xoxoxoxox

      LOVE MY FOOD (since I don’t love eating.)

      PS, When you hear this show, I think you will be surprised. It is pretty positive and upbeat, not at ALL pathetic 😉 – ok, maybe just a little. hahahahahah

  3. Stéfanie

    Hi, famous Jill!

    I’ve binged through all episodes too. I was jealous as I heard you were only halfway lol! Lucky Jill still had HOURS to enjoy in front of her… but I read you’re all cought up now!!! Well, if you and I are anything alike, you may feel a little down (oh no…. no more episodes to consume) but this down will soon be replaced by the joy of being an active participant in this community. Welcome xx

    And Dave, I was touched by your braveries and shed a tear listening to your open hearted comments. You are amongst people who get you here. welcome xx

    And to all other new companions that I coudn’t welcome as I myself have been out of the loop lately, and not very well in the eating/emotions/self-care departement. But I’m emerging now! Just as cats do when they are hurt by pulling away in a dark space until they heal, I think I prefer ‘suffering’ alone . Although support is part of the solution, isolation can also be helpful and part of the process of healing.

    Hey to the rest of the regular BC’S too xxxx

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hello Mon Amie, so good to see you again.

      Although support is part of the solution, isolation can also be helpful and part of the process of healing.

      I agree, there are times we need to ‘cocoon’ and regroup in our own time, in our own space and tend to our own emotions and energy. And I am very happy that you are peeking out now, and sharing once with us. I hope you are feeling refreshed and renewed. xoxoxoxoxox

    2. Dave

      Hi famous Jill, Your and the other BC support is truly comforting…Right now my life feels like it’s spinning out of control….and being a control freak like I am…this is really rough, however I find Laurie’s podcasts including the BC comments a very safe place to be.

      I am still listening to all the old podcasts I’m up to 61.

      Thanks for all the hugs.

  4. dawny

    heard the episode yesterday =-) and your commentary’s are FABULOUS.. love the ‘SELF love gasps & horrors’ you ROCK my friend.. Im so happy for you.. and I really enjoyed hearing it vs reading it, it was so much more funnnnnn

    Tho puzzled, because you referenced that there was a show with no comments, not sure ive ever NOT commented.. hmmmmmm LOL.. guess it could’ve happened.. hee hee

    I have called and left some foolish funs before too, but the voice thing seems wonky some-times and I never know if it sent or not, but yah =-) maybe just some of my ideas of foolishness and funn-ness aren’t making the cut..

    busy busy busy weekend ahead but SUPER thankful it’s the weekend in intself.. no work, and fun times win win win..

    I wog-a-bout-ed yesterday afternoon in the beautiful weather sunshiney day, and my foot paid the price =-( stupid, tho today it’s feeling pretty okay again, sooooo not sure how to decipher the message.. ive been mostly doing non-impactual activities (bike; eliptical) so the wog-a-bout was after a time off, and I did step it up a notch or so to really get ‘something’ out of the walk.. hmmm the things to think..

    Hoping a SUPER awesome weekend ahead for everyone else too

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hi Dawny, I’m glad you enjoyed day 112 and my CRAZY read of my blog post. I took it as an opportunity to practice some of my voice work. I was pretty tired by that time, and my vocal cords were a bit worn – hmmm, maybe I should do takes of CRAZY blog posts at the START of my recording session? But then again, I am so dang literal, I always, always, record the show pretty much in the order you hear it, as that is the flow that makes sense to me. No worries, I DO have your Foolish Fun calls saved, and your 2nd tip as well. In fact, I WAS going to use one of the FF in day 112, but when Mark left his comment and Dave posted his bike jokes, I just couldn’t resist. You will be Foolish Funning again on another day. Oh, and you DID comment, I thought I remembered it, but it isn’t ON the episode day, it was on one of the status days that followed mixed in with other stuff, so it didn’t track with me. But I DID notice that you and Dave were commenting, emailing and participating through my season of crickets. AND I’m so glad Mark decided to comment, so at least Day 111 isn’t a TOTAL zero. When new BCs come check out the blog, if others have commented, they are encouraged to reach out. When they see NO recent comments, they tend to pass by. I can tell this by the visits vs. posts or contact form entries, and there is a correlation. So when BCs post comments, not only do they support me and each other, they make it more likely that newer BCs will be brave and say hello. But again, *I* can’t really do anything to increase comments, so I have to let it all go. It has been one of the HARDEST lessons to learn. To notice, to appreciate what is, accept what is, and move forward with my own life. Very hard. You, dear Dawny, have been a rock and made these hard lessons SO much easier to bear with your wacky, fun support and your willingness to share good and bad. You have really been a blessing to me. ::::SMOOCH:::::
      PS, take it easy with your foot – that can be a bitch to recover from if you push it. xoxoxoxo

  5. Sue

    As usual this was a thought provoking episode. I guess it would be much kinder if I warned you when i know I am going to be out of the loop for a while and not particularly active. I’ve had a lot more time with family recently and this will continue for a few months. This has been wonderful but emotionally exhausting!

    It is now timetabling season at school and all my mental energy goes into problem solving. My challenge this year is to find times to switch off during my down times during this process – normally my mind keeps jumping back to all the many things I need to remember and possible ideas. I will take my tapestry project to school but sometimes I find following a pattern is much harder than normal (not sure why).

    I find the blogs and episodes very thought provoking, but if I listen to them late at night I’ve forgotten what I wanted to say when I get up. It is always great to read the comments and hear the extra features.
    Anyway as I have had strange headaches most of the day and can’t seem to string together a coherent thought I will stop writing for the evening!

    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hi Sue, just on our way out for our anniversary fun, but I wanted to make sure you don’t worry. You DO usually tell me when you need to be away, and that is quite kind of you. It just so happened that around day 111 EVERYONE (except Dave and Dawny) seemed to have other things on their plate. My take away was actually positive, that I can live through the lack of participation MUCH better than before, as I am very focused on my own goals etc. So please don’t sweat it. I’m always THRILLED to hear from you, but support you in taking the time you need to make your own life more what you need. xoxoxoxoox

  6. Amy from WI

    Hi Laurie,
    I also wanted to let you know that I haven’t gone away, and that I have been waiting for each podcast! I get a little thrill when I see that there is a new one. I help with choreography and costumes for our school play each year, so between that and regular teaching duties and family busyness (lots of spring birthdays), I’ve gotten out of the habit of reading and commenting on my usual blogs.

    I’m so glad that you have moved on to a place where, even though it is disappointing, you can carry on and make yourself happy without your BCs to chat with. You have made so much progress over the last year. I wish I could say the same for myself. I feel like any progress that I had made, I’ve backslid into some of the same old patterns. *sigh* The play is this week, so I am hoping that I can start focusing on me again this coming weekend and can get myself back onto a good track.

    Thanks for being here and continuing to podcast even when the rest of us get quiet!


    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hi Amy, I’m so happy to see you here today! No worries, I know you have been busy and I’m very glad you got the gist of my last show, which was the amazing growth I recognized in myself in this area. That’s not to say I didn’t have my whiney, ‘woe-is-me’ thoughts and temptations. But something you’ve written here really resonates with my take on how we view our patterns.

      I feel like any progress that I had made, I’ve backslid into some of the same old patterns. *sigh* The play is this week, so I am hoping that I can start focusing on me again this coming weekend and can get myself back onto a good track.

      Sometimes, I think we feel we are on a set track, like when in a roller coaster’s car, and we move forward in time experiencing whatever we think and feel at that place. So if we “aren’t up to standard” in some way, we feel from a tad bit disappointed to all out defeated. But that doesn’t take into view ALL that’s in our life at that moment. As you’ve written, you were busy building joy with your class and your family. What a wonderful success! To be relating and creating with them these moments. If your dealings with food slipped a bit, to what you wished, you STILL moved on with life. And the progress can be seen in that you did not berate yourself or let despair overshadow the joy you built.

      It’s like my disappointment in the lack of BC participation. That DID sting. I WAS disappointed. I DID have doubts. But I decided not to focus on that part. But to acknowledge my feeling and move on to other things to create in my life. Namely, voice work. During this ‘fallow’ BC time, I made breakthroughs in my practice and in my understanding of where I need to be in my voice work. I also acknowledge that my body of work is good with COD. Even if I NEVER recorded another episode. It is good. (not that I’m planning to stop at the moment). But I imagined it. What if this is over? What if BCs have gotten all they want or need from the show? And I realized that would be OK. I am still a success with this project and all I need do is listen to Fionna’s song with all of you in it to know that. You, my dear Amy, I have no doubts about. You will continue to build joy in your life and find your way with food. It will probably never be a straight line, but each moment you acknowledge what’s true for you and create your moments in that manner, treasuring what resonates and letting go the rest, you will find in awhile, that life is good, and food is not the boss of you! Even if you ate 100 cookies, the cookies can’t change the love you have and experience (though they CAN tempt you to focus on perceived lack of control). In my world view, many cookies (standing in for any food blip) is a symptom. There to be noticed, noted, then forgotten in the priority of building more joy with yourself and with the people in your world. And from my very, outside view, dear Amy, at THAT you are a resounding success! xoxoxoxox


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