Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary

January 25, 2015

Status 1-25-15*

PROUD OF MY BRAVERY – Voice Acting was challenging as I had limited sleep the night before due to the Santa Ana winds rattling my cage all night, and the emotional demons rolling around in my head didn’t help. But as wrote yesterday, come what may, I intended to focus on the moment and to also tell myself, no matter what feedback I might get in the booth, “Thanks for helping me get used to pressure”. This technique was intended to calm me down so I could listen to the feedback and learn, and to also keep me from totally hyperventilating and thus losing my needed breath control for the next take.

Hooray! I did well and Marc, my director actually praised my acting in the spot. I’m happy, because my voice acting coach, David, did a great job prepping me for this one and I was proud of the attempt. Not only was I proud because I received positive feedback as well as what to improve, but that I faced a whoppin’ big fear. “Booth fright” was growing for me. And what is strange about that is I NEVER have stage fright when public speaking, as many do. Of course, in that case I’m just being myself (my stage self anyway).

The other great thing about focusing, TRULY focusing on the moment, is you don’t have time for depression. Your mind likes to devote itself to one track. Even multi-tasking is just changing focus very rapidly. So to focus each moment on what is most important at THAT time (in my case, the skills and techniques required for nailing a voice acting spot) kept me off the “depression” train for awhile. A nice relief, that.

Depression doesn’t just “poof away”, but you can do things to help yourself. And going ahead with my coaching and lessons was one thing I did to help myself.

Thanks BCs

Also, I was overwhelmed with love and gratitude to see the support in your comments and emails of my pondering a decision about the show, whatever that may be. It really made me feel good, AND your empathy helped me to take the pressure off of myself.
No worries, COD won’t go “poof”. If it changes or ends, you will get plenty of notice. I’m still in the early thought process right now and will follow my therapist’s advice not to make any decision until I’m free of depression’s grip once more.

Show 100

Feb 3 will be the one year anniversary of the start of the show, and it will ALSO be day 100. Please call the bravery hotline or send some audio with your good wishes or jokes or stories or songs to help me celebrate this milestone. Both my VO acting coach David and my director Marc have agreed to interviews to help me celebrate. And I have a few more tricks up my sleeve. I REALLY hope you can find a way to be part of this milestone show too!

Today

HIKING OR RECORDING – I may hike and record day 99 or go to the park for a stroll and some time on the podcast rock. I’m hoping to get Day 99 out this week so I can concentrate on show 100. We are also expecting stormy rain early in the week, and it’s sunny today. Doh! Can’t veg with junk TV and procrastinate. Kind of a good thing, that. In this moment, what do I want to concentrate on? Day 99.

How about you?

Please feel free to comment on MY statuses or add YOUR OWN thoughts, feelings, challenges, rants and raves on these pages too. That was one of the original purposes of why I posted on FB. I thought BCs might like to share about THEIR days. So if you have thoughts and feelings you’d like to share with the group, go ahead and put them here with your comments.

*Daily statuses are not part of the blog’s email notification. When you enter your email under where it says SUBSCRIBE TO POSTS VIA EMAIL, you will be notified of regular blog posts and when podcast episodes are released. I didn’t want to clog your inbox with my daily statuses. However, the automatic publicize feature will inform you on my show FB page, my AdventureLaurie twitter account, google+ on its show page, and Tumblr.

Body Balance


BB (Body Balance) number 8 Sleep: 8 hours divided (decent both parts). Tummy/Gut: Gut only slightly full. Didn’t eat much yesterday, as I cannot do voice work on a full tummy. BUT I did have a good dinner when I came home. Not Hungry within one hour of waking, but will have a hiking breakfast before I go. Energy: High Moderate Mood: upbeat.

BB is my personal criteria, and I don’t think too hard about it. I ask myself at the keyboard, what is my BB? A number between 1-10, including halves, pops into my head. I write it in my post Then I figure out why it is higher or lower and gently make note.

If you are interested these are my measures.

  1. Sleep. Quality and Amount.
  2. Tummy/Gut – If I ate what my body asked for, usually above and below the belly button feel balanced. Ate too much, below the belly button feels more full. Ate too little, the reverse.
  3. Am I hungry within 1 hour of waking? I have found that I feel best if I am hungry within 1 hour of waking. This tends to make my eating day even and not heavy on food in the evening. But I don’t eat if not hungry unless I’m about to ride or hike. I’ve learned I need to fuel these morning activities, or I’ll bonk.
  4. What is my energy level? Subjective, but telling.
  5. A quick look at my mood.

The Bravery Coach

TheBraveryCoach daily tweet is a morning mediation on how I either did, or can incorporate an aspect of bravery into my day. It is cheerful. It is esteem building. Those who want to follow these on Twitter may, by searching for the hashtag #bravery or by seeing my profile:

Daily Bravery Tweets via TheBraveryCoach on Twitter

6 thoughts on “1-25-15

  1. Dawny

    I can feel/sense a bit of non-depressed happiness in your post friend.

    Yahooo for a bit higher bb number =~} proud of you for persevering thru everyday and going thru each day as its ‘own’ day. You rock my friend and inspire me to trudge on.

    I’m excited for another episode as always =~}
    I hope you have a lovely day n all goes well/right in your world and life today friend.

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Haha Dawny, you posted your comment RIGHT when I was wrapping up my ‘Comment answering time’, But yes, I feel better today, even though the depression is still there. I’m feeling better because I was feeling very low yesterday, and was able to do what I needed by changing my focus down to mini mini increments. That is HUGE because it removes some of the fear and helplessness I feel when depression comes to call. For now, I’m staying OFF the scale and giving my body a chance to tell me what it needs, and I think that is a good decision that’s giving me some peace too. xoxoxoxox

      Reply
  2. Adam

    Hi Laurie-

    It has been a real joy to work my way through your archives over the last few days. I wish I had found your site earlier but it is also nice to be able to dive head first into someones else’s story (kind of like binge-watching a tv show that you love) – you truly have a gift at sharing your story and have given a unique voice to not only compulsive over-eating but life in general.

    Congratulations on being on the brink of 100 episodes! What an accomplishment. I have not dove into your podcasts yet but that is next. Happy to be a fellow traveler!

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Wow, thank you SO MUCH Adam! I think you are one of the first BCs (Brave Companions – what we call each other who listen, read, participate in Compulsive Overeating Diary) to find me through my blog vs. the podcast. That’s really neat! I don’t think much about my writing, so I am doubly touched by your comments.
      I don’t know if you know, I can’t remember where I write or discuss it, but I had a severe bike accident with head injury, so reading and writing are both challenging for me. One reason I don’t write as much. But I also had injury to my face and upper lip that made it hard to speak clearly and a newly minted stuttering problem came along for the ride. That is how I started podcasting. I used to hike in the mountains near my home and speak into my iPhone for practice. Then I would meet other hikers and interview them for fun. That turned into my first show, Daily Adventure Tales. Now I’m actually studying voice acting, so even in the heart of despair, my life turned around by me doing what I could at the time. I’m hoping your journal will do the same for you. From the entries I’ve read, you are a very gifted writer. Powerful, with a strong, unique point of view. Sadly, I didn’t see your permission to mention your blog in time for me to mention it in Day 99, but I will put a link in that episode’s show notes – in fact, I’ll make it resource of the day. And I’ll probably, give you another shout-out in day 101. Thanks so much again for taking the time to encourage me, it means a lot. And please feel free to tell us your thoughts on any of the topics you discover reading the blog, statuses, or listening to the show. We care what you think and what you have to say.

      Reply
  3. Fionna

    Hi Laurie!

    Glad I took the time to stop by and catch up on your last few statuses. Sorry to hear that you are dealing with depression, but I can see that you are doing what you need to do to get through it. That’s a really good point that when our mind is engaged and focused on THIS MOMENT, we get a break from thinking about our thoughts. What a great tool. That must be why I feel so good when I sing or work on writing music – my mind is completely engaged in the activity, and my inner demon Mr. Negativity is kept at bay. Speaking of writing music, OH MY GOSH EPISODE 100 AND THE ANNIVERSARY is coming up!!! So exciting! I will definitely be working on something for the show.

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hooray! I can’t wait to hear it πŸ™‚ Also, I still have hope some more BCs will send me their recorded audio to put into our brave companions song for that show. I think that would be awesome. xoxoxoxo
      PS, tell Mr. Negativity to take a hike, as you are truly gifted and a wonderful, kind soul! (Come back and re-read as needed) πŸ˜‰

      Reply

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