Ep 0045 – Bonus – Critical Alien Robots Kindly Get OUT of my Stinkin’ Mind!

Laurie by a house in the trees behind the park walking trail.
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Here I am on my hobbly way around the park for episode 45. I stop in front of a home lucky enough to back right up to the park. How cool is that?

Podcast Recap

I take a bonus walk to clear my head. The Alien Robots attack my mind all weekend with self-criticism and visions of chips making my bad back all better. Valiantly, I overcome their taunts thanks to encouragement from Brave Companions Sue, Anne, Jodi, Danielle, Abby, and Janet . I give you an unflinching glimpse into the battle despite fearing to once again, come off as pathetic. As I finally return to walking, -er hobbling, with my cane around the park after my weekend of severe back trouble, I ponder the difference between fact and what those pesky robot aliens have to say. Josh Woodward says, ‘Thanks’ for supporting his Kickstarter campaign.
Field and trees

View directly across from where I stopped by the house. I love the white-trunked, twisty trees in the distance.

Josh Woodward holds a sign saying "Thanks a Million Laurie!"

Josh Woodward, the composer and singer of the song I use for my theme, “I’m letting go”, thanks me for supporting him on Kickstarter.

Mentioned

Josh Woodward’s Thank you video on YouTube

Direct link to ‘I’m Letting Go’ on Josh Woodward’s site where you can either support him by buying it from iTunes or download it for free by signing up for Josh’s newsletter. Trust me, he won’t spam you.

Alen Standish’s podcast and blog, Quit Binge Eating

Jillian Michaels podcast in iTunes, the Jillian Michaels Show

Episode 44 – the one almost without comments, as of today. (see below)

Michelle Mac’s comment about episode 44 posted as a reply to MY comment on day 43. Thanks Michelle!

My good and loyal friend Cheryl beat me while I was publishing this “woe is me” episode and posted an interesting comment on Day 44 – See Robot Aliens, you are a bunch of stinkin’ liars!

Our new “Who are the Brave Companions” page. Come tell your story!

Catch up with Laurie

My Spreaker page. Please follow me there if you are on Spreaker.

My Instagram page at LaurieDreamWeaver

FaceBook Page if you want to sign up for our email list by clicking Tiger the Cat’s Sign-up button

Laurie on Tumblr

My new page with instructions for all of the ways (so far) that you can send audio and lend your voice to this podcast.

New free way to leave voicemail http://speakpipe.com/laurieweaver You can also click the blue button on this page that says ‘send a voice message.’

Bravery Hotline

Leave your comments, questions, feelings and stories on Laurie’s podcast voicemail hotline – 206-350-6445.

Credits

Host: Laurie Weaver

Main Theme: I’m Letting Go by Josh Woodward from The Simple Life Part 1

I’m Letting Go (Josh Woodward) / CC BY 3.0

Resource of the day


Having Tea With Your Critical Mind
by Byron Katie, from the blog, ‘Work With Grace’. Easy to read, short, post about the critical mind and ways to overcome it. Love the image of inviting it to tea!
Comments box:

10 thoughts on “Ep 0045 – Bonus – Critical Alien Robots Kindly Get OUT of my Stinkin’ Mind!

  1. Stéfanie

    Hi Laurie and brave companions,

    I’m up to episode 29 and I can’t wait to be up to speed with all of you. I am ready to join this community and engage myself more deeply but am feeling out of phase with you because I’m delayed in my podcast listening. Anyway…. trying to catch up… I have this strange feeling that I can’t completely engage yet…. Like I feel some sense or sort of spoiler alert…

    Laurie, I had this spontaneous idea, and I pondered before proposing it to you because of self-doubt. But ‘I’m letting go’ :). I have an exercice to propose to you. It would involve a mission that I would give you. One that I can’t unveil now, since it would defeat its purpose if I tell you. If you choose to accept the mission in a leap of faith and engage in completing it, I will share the mission.

    2 infos to help you decide : 1) I propose this exercice in love and kindness. It is in no way humiliating nor malignous. 2) It would make great podcasting material 😉

    I don’t know you, but I love you 🙂

    Stéfanie

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hi Stéfanie, it’s wonderful to see you again! It is strange that my podcast diary is kind of like a TV show where you are a season behind and don’t want to know what happens 🙂 Since I watch my TV on Netflix and Hulu and I can relate to that.

      One way you might participate now with no fear of “finding out” early is to post your hellos on our ‘Who are the brave companions‘ page. This is a place for the brave companions to tell whatever about themselves that they like – food issues or not, where they live, hobbies, contact info on other sites like Twitter etc. As much or as little as feels right.

      It’s a place to go if you want to know more about someone whose comment you’ve read, or if I mention them on the show.

      AS to your idea, I think it is wonderful you were brave and proposed it.

      I do trust it is with good intention, but to be honest it makes me nervous. My word is very important to me, and I have fear that if I agree, even if I want to accomplish your mission, it may turn out to be something I cannot do, for whatever reason. Money, time, goes against the family agreements I have with my husband etc. I would feel terrible to let you down after I told you I would. So I consider most proposals very carefully.

      On the other hand, I do believe in leaps of faith – so I am quite torn.

      Is there any other information you can share and not destroy your proposal?

      I AM quite proud of you for asking, and want you to notice this is NOTHING to do with you or your idea, my fear is all about ME and how I feel. 🙂

      Reply
      1. Stéfanie

        Hi Laurie!

        First, I listened to episode 29 where you gave me a shoutout. Thanks!

        I wanted to keep you updated on my short podcasting career lol. I recorded (over and over) 3 episodes and realized it was too much for me, for now! With my many projects on the go, I chose to let this one go. I must say that through the process, I realized that recording thoughts and feelings in an organized but spontaneous way is quite a task so, congrats to you, as you have a natural gift and I admire that!

        As for catching up on your episodes, I intend doing that in a week or two, as I am very eager to be up to date 🙂

        As for my proposition, I came on a little too strong 🙂
        Let me take a step back a little and explain a little the context around it.

        First, I feel that you are very generous with all of us and I want to give back. Because I’ve been listening to you think out loud, I have this ‘outside’ (is that the word?) view of you. A little like a mirror, maybe? I think my proposal could be my way of saying thanks.
        Second, I totally understand you holding back. I’m this complete stranger!!! I do not expect trust at first sight 🙂 I feel I know you privately because you podcast, and I guess that for a moment, I thought it went both ways and forgot that I was just listening. . You know, a little like hollywood stars whom you feel you personaly know because you’ve seen them so often. 🙂

        Let me outline my proposition:
        I was very much inspired by your episodes around perfectionism. It resonated with me since I also think often about my need to control and its relashionship with my food issues. The song ‘I’m letting go’ resonates in that sense too… The need to let go being the opposite of controling.

        My exercice consists in ‘letting go’ and having faith in pure spontaneousity (I’m not sure that’s a word). I wanted to propose to you to go to a zen spot and record, freestyle, your thoughts, insights, etc. on a subject related to compulsive overeating. Of course, to keep it spontaneous, I can’t say the subject right away! 🙂 But you would ALWAYS have the control and option to share the results with us, if you feel it is worth it.

        I have no idea where this can bring you (or us) but I have this hunch it might be interesting. I have heard you many times give examples of how ‘letting go’ finally gave you such great results. Remember that b-day card that came in the day after you let it go? Remember that letter you got from Iheart radio just after letting go? I could go on with many other examples I’ve heard you say… So this is my gift to you, an exercice about letting go 🙂

        Please, please feel free to say no. I will not be disappointed, nor mad, nor sad.

        I am going to fill up that ‘Who are the brave companions’ right now, so you and others can get to know me!

        Oh, and BTW, I saw this go by on FB, laughted it, loved the irony of it, wanted to share with you: http://www.someecards.com/usercards/viewcard/MjAxMy00ZWZmMTk1OWMwMGYxZTRk

        I dont’ know you, but I love you!

        Stéfanie 🙂

        Reply
        1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

          Hi Stéfanie, Thanks for letting me know about your podcast results so far. It is harder than it appears and I am very grateful that I seem to have a talent for it. Also, I don’t think it would be as easy if I was still working full time. Because I am retired, I have loads of time to sit around thinking about my life and to ponder all of the great points you and the other brave companions bring up.

          Now that you’ve explained your proposal a bit more, I’m all for it! It would be like comedy improv where the audience shouts out words and the comedians make a skit based on those words – except this would be a topic for me from you! I think that would be really fun. 🙂

          Thanks too for telling your story on the “Who are the brave companions” page. It is really cool to get to know you all better. You would be surprised how much I feel like I know all of you too, even though you are for the most part, words on a page.
          When I speak my heart alone on the mountain, I can feel you brave companions and I am comforted. I never fit in before. In all of my life I felt so different and alone. Now I finally know how a community feels and I’m so very grateful. So don’t feel badly that you asked me to have a leap of faith as you would a friend. We are friends of the spirit, even though you don’t know me in real life – except for what I’ve shared during my show. I don’t know you, but I love and care about you too!

          PS, that link was VERY funny 🙂

          Reply
          1. Stéfanie

            OK Laurie, we are on !!!
            I’m up to episode 38 now so, almost in tune! Do you have a preference as to how you would like to receive the subjects ? I am opened to email, but I can send a voicemail if you prefer! Whatever suits you, as long as you don’t peak 😉
            Stéfanie xx

          2. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

            Hi Stéfanie, why don’t you try speakpipe and see if you can send me a voicemail. That would be so cool! http://speakpipe.com/laurieweaver
            I was also thinking of trying to schedule a live show via Spreaker. If I do that, it would be the perfect venue for your proposal. Then you could email or use Facebook, or even this site to send me the topic and I would address it live. Not in a Zen spot true, but it will be hard to get your topics as a surprise as I don’t get phone reception in the mountain. That means I would have to carry the message with me in some way… Hmm, I’ll keep thinking. But if more brave companions would also like to participate in this idea, then it may be a good way to do a scheduled live event.

  2. Cheryl

    Oooo! Tough topics today. Your comments on wishing others well even when there’s been some miscommunications between you that may cause things to be awkward, etc., reminds me a whole lot of a comment Sarah Ban Breathnach made in her book I’m journaling through (“Peace and Plenty”). She said that by acknowledging the good things in your life every day (even in the midst of crisis or drama), by default you’re admitting that you HAVE RECEIVED good things.

    Now I’m a horrible whiner when it comes to the money struggles we’re having, so the idea of doing that, of either running through a list of things in my head or actually keeping a gratitude journal, seemed pointless to me. But I’ve been doing it. And sometimes it’s harder than h*ll to come up with even ONE THING I’m grateful for when I’m lying in bed at night trying to concoct a list. The amazing thing is, I’ve really seen/heard/felt a change in my attitude over the past few weeks. It’s almost as if when my mind starts to focus on that feeling of lack (which is one of my biggest fears in life, that I won’t have the basic things I need — I’m figuring out that gets much worse the older one gets) I have begun making a U-turn without even thinking about it. Not every time, to be sure, but often enough that even his lordship has noticed. There’s just some small way in which my brain is beginning to be rewired from the little exercise.

    I’m guessing it’s kind of the same way with sending people off with a blessing when there has not been the best of interchanges or relationship. Just the practice of doing that almost implies that a person IS letting go of the frustrations and moving on. So I really appreciate all your comments about that. We all have those times in our lives. I know I would feel far less stressed and tempted to eat if I could NOT dwell on what’s over and done. So thanks for that.

    The other thing I wondered about is whether what you were REALLY having a problem with was the SILENCE itself, rather than that you weren’t getting any responses. Despite your insecurities, I know you. I know you ARE level-headed, logical, gracious… And you KNOW that folks have heaping plates of life. But for people like me, people who tend to use others around them as mirrors in their life to tell them who they need to be at any given moment (with the kids, mom; with the hubby, wife; with the mom, daughter; work — well that can be any number of things) NOT having a mirror to look into can be HORRIBLY incapacitating. Sometimes it feels like standing in the middle of a room with no one else around and wondering what in the world you’re supposed to be doing. How you’re supposed to be acting, thinking, feeling… It can be downright debilitating for me.

    It’s taken me a long time to learn to be okay with being alone in a silent place in my life. Feeling like if I wasn’t busy with the kids or church or whatever that I have no reason to be here. Finding out who I am when I’m just me has been a real challenge.

    So I don’t know if you struggle with that or not, but thought I’d ask anyway. And maybe others reading this can identify. Good job on a difficult podcast.

    Reply
    1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

      Hmmm My friend, I think you have NAILED IT! Brava!!!! I really was wondering why I was feeling pathetic (as I defined it to myself), when I truly DO know at this point that the brave companions are out there and care. But I felt so bereft – like the time I was 4 years old and lost at the beach, away from my parents.

      The other thing I wondered about is whether what you were REALLY having a problem with was the SILENCE itself, rather than that you weren’t getting any responses. Despite your insecurities, I know you. I know you ARE level-headed, logical, gracious… And you KNOW that folks have heaping plates of life. But for people like me, people who tend to use others around them as mirrors in their life to tell them who they need to be at any given moment (with the kids, mom; with the hubby, wife; with the mom, daughter; work — well that can be any number of things) NOT having a mirror to look into can be HORRIBLY incapacitating. Sometimes it feels like standing in the middle of a room with no one else around and wondering what in the world you’re supposed to be doing. How you’re supposed to be acting, thinking, feeling… It can be downright debilitating for me.

      Now it all makes sense. My back injury kept me from my Zen space, Mark was busy with his things, and there I was, alone with my thoughts – but usually, it is a comment or interaction with the brave companions that triggers my thoughts about what I want to record next – so I felt lonely. Thanks for letting me think about this today, it will be a great help, next time I get in that ‘pathetic’ mood when you are all busily leading your own lives 🙂

      Reply
      1. Michelle

        Hello Laurie, oh I felt so horrible when I listened to podcast 45 and learned you were feeling down about the lack of immediate responses and suffering from a back injury. The weekend was so busy for me, it was my 43 rd birthday on Sunday and I walked a 5k with girlfriends plus spent the rest of the weekend away from my computer doing outdoor things and birthday celebratory things. I felt so bad that you were feeling down about the lack of the responses. I enjoy your podcasts so much that I like to savor them and I was still digesting podcast 43. Oh I feel like a horrible new cyber friend. My apologies! BTW, I love the latest photo of you, you seem so cheerful there. Anyway, I know how hard it can be to process expectations and come to terms with the up and down feeling that occurs when you are expecting things to happen one way and then another one does . Can’t wait to hear your latest podcast. I’m feeling very good today about my food struggles. I ate well, within my normal range during the week lunch party. I think it definitely helped that it was during the day. I think the abbreviation HALT is very true for me, meaning try not to let yourself get too hungry, angry, lonely or tired- it is during those times that you are the most vulnerable to binge eating. Well I have laundry to fold and legs to shave. With summer almost here, shorts don’t look so nice with hairy legs at least on me. I hope you are feeling better and I cant wait to hear what your latest adventure is. Sending you love, Michelle 2

        Reply
        1. Laurie@CompulsiveOvereatingDiary Post author

          Hey there Michelle! Wow, it’s been a huge birthday week for the brave companions! Happy birthday, and please know I’m DELIGHTED you were out having fun. Don’t feel badly for a second. I record how I feel and process it that way. No worries. I know you guys are out there. I know you all ‘love me’. It’s my old abandonment programming kicking in and nothing you or the other brave companions did or didn’t do. 🙂 Thanks for the compliment on my photo. I think I’m getting better at selfie-taking, and I’m not as self-conscious. Congrats on your food progress and for reminding me about HALT. That’s so true! Thanks too for reaching out and commenting on the other brave companions’ posts. That is my favorite thing to see happen. So all is well in Laurie’s little world today.

          Reply

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