Tag Archives: LaurieDreamWeaver

Ep 0139 – Everything Is a Miracle

Laurie in red head scarf and blue long sleeved shirt at top of trail with bright cloudless sky behind - face in shadow
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I’m smiling because I appreciate the miracle of shade on such a bright and sunny day.

Podcast Recap

I let go of life on autopilot and learn to see the miracles all around. We celebrate a HUGE bravery report moment for BC Petra. Welcome to New BCs Stephanie from West Virginia who reached out on FB and Theresa who posted on Day 9. We get a sample of comments from Mary S., BC Laura R (soon to be S), Dawny and Amy from WI. Thanks again to Amazon shoppers. Big thanks also to Kindred Spirit, Josephine who left a kind review on USA iTunes, and a big, big smooch to BC Mary S. who sent me a heart-touching gift in the mail. I read a snippet of the blog post I wrote about what Mary’s gift meant to me. We meet my friend and new BC JoJo from CA who stopped by the blog to comment.

Sturdy wooden bench under a tree - you can see the tall, waving grass surrounds it.

The famous Next To Top Zen Bench – where I record most of the shows from the mountain.

Pink blossoms on a skinny, low growing cactus along the rocks of the path

Caught these small delicate flowers growing up from a cactus-like plant in rocky dry conditions. This inspired me.

New BCs

BC Theresa who commented on Day 9
BC Stephanie from West Virginia who reached out on Facebook
BC JoJo from CA who commented on the blog post about Mary S.’s gift.


Last show and comments

My meditation recommendations to Dawny

Insight Timer, the app I use for guided meditation

Our Social Media TAG is #CODBCS

Follow Petra on Instagram at PetraDoingPetra

The link to Petra’s bravery report-worthy post

I’m on Instagram as LaurieDreamWeaver

You can like the show on FaceBook at Facebook.com/compulsiveovereatingdiary.com

Link to the Bravery Report page – where you can download your own certificate of episode completion, get a printable bravery report certificate or post your bravery for all BCs to see!

The Blog post where you can see photos of Mary S.’s gift

New BC Theresa’s comment on Day 9

Direct Link to Episode Completion PDF

Day 136 – Where Mark and I talked about our marriage and BC Mary S. commented about it.

Ways to support the show financially


Host: Laurie Weaver

Main Theme: I’m Letting Go by Josh Woodward from The Simple Life Part 1 Used by permission of Josh Woodward under a Creative Commons License

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Ep 0120 – The Grand Finale

Laurie and Mark in front of the mic
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So long, Adieu, Auf Wiedersehen, Adiós, Cheerio! From Mark and me in our new sound studio. We’ve had a great time making this show and we send you much love along with it.

Podcast Recap

The epic end of the series. I visit all three of my regular podcast spots and walk down memory lane as well as look toward the future. Features include – a new song by BC Fionna Lane titled A Light in the Dark. A live radio play written by BC David Glowen, directed by David Babich and starring professional and student voice actors. Good-bye audio messages from Cheryl, Sue from the UK, BC Dave, Stéfanie from Quebec, María from Spain and Fionna. Foolish Fun with Dawny Taylor. Stéfanie’s Secret Topic. Stories read by members of the writing group. Good-bye comments from BCs. We welcome the last new BC, Petra. An interview with Alen Standish. Hear my work in the sound booth with voice acting director David Babich as we work on my professional demo. Mark stands in one last time for my scale, and much much more!

At Descanso Gardens

Laurie blows a kiss near an oak tree

A kiss from Descanso Gardens

A wooden bench near an oak tree

The actual podcast bench by the dry river bed at Descanso Gardens

dry river bed

The view of the dry river bed from the podcast bench at Descanso Gardens

Mentioned at Descanso Gardens

Cheryl’s blog, Impromptu Promptlings
Dr. Nina Savelle-Rocklin’s Win the Diet War

Ways to continue to support the show financially

At The Podcast Rock at My Local Park

Laurie in glasses smiling with hat brim turned up

I’m having fun recording Stéfanie’s Secret Topic on the podcast rock

Boulders in the woods under trees

The actual podcast rock from my local park.

trees and brush in the back of the park

The view from the podcast rock at my local park

Mentioned at the podcast rock

Alen Standish’s new show, Inner Effort
Write It Up! The Writing Group Mark and I attend
Stéfanie’s IG account, Weightloss_Stef

At The Next To Upper Zen Spot

Laurie holds her recorder near her face. Slightly sad look to her eyes.

That’s a wrap! I just got through recording how much I really, really, really, really, really care on day 120.

Wooden bench in some brush near a tree

The actual bench at the Next to Upper Zen Spot

Sunrise seen from the mountain

The early morning view from the Next to Upper Zen Spot the day I finished recording Day 120

Mentioned at the Next to Upper Zen Spot

Actor and Director, David Babich
Fionna’s Blog, Fionna Sings
My Bravery Twitter Account, TheBraveryCoach
My IG Account, LaurieDreamWeaver


Host: Laurie Weaver
Special Guest interview: Alen Standish of Inner Effort
Special Guest interview and Laurie in the Sound Booth Voice Acting Direction: David Babich of David Babich Studio
Laurie’s Stories Intro Announcer: Mark Weaver
Dave vs.The Robot Aliens Written by: Dave Glowen
Dave vs.The Robot Aliens Directed by: David Babich
Dave vs.The Robot Aliens Cast:

  • Taylor Watkins as Dave
  • David Babich as Robot Alien #1
  • Ray Holdridge as Robot Alien #2
  • Valerie Schrementi (Alvarez) as Robot Alien #3
  • Laurie Weaver as herself

Laurie’s Foolish Fun Intro Announcer: Mark Weaver
Laurie’s Foolish Funner: Dawny Taylor
Stéfanie’s Secret Topic Intro Announcer: Mark Weaver
Stéfanie’s Secret Topic concept, content and voice by: Stéfanie Lepage
Mark’s No-Diet Report Intro Announcer: Mark Weaver
Bravery Alert Announcer: Mark Weaver
Writing Group Member Stories
The Judge written and read by Peter (J.P.) Bumstead
The Birch Bat written and read by Jake Terrell
The Collector written and read by Samantha Marquis
The Beach written and read by Mark Weaver

Main Theme: I’m Letting Go by Josh Woodward from The Simple Life Part 1 Used by permission of Josh Woodward under a Creative Commons License

Featured Song

Light in the Dark
Music and Lyrics by Fionna Lane
Hear More of Fionna’s music on Soundcloud
Fionna’s Blog, Fionna Sings

Light in the Dark

Well the time has come
I must move on
We have come to journey’s end
So I’ll say “goodbye” and I’ll be on my way
I will carry memories with me
And I’ll always call you “friend”
I’ve a feeling we will meet again one day

Thank you for loving me selflessly
You gave me strength to find what I need
We’ll be apart, but you’re always in my heart
I hope you know
You were my light in the dark

What will I do in my new life?
Gonna travel ’round the world
I’ll be anywhere I want to be
The best part is I’m livin’
And I’m brave and feeling free
And I’ll proudly say “I’m happy to be me!”


At last I’m not scared of my tears
I let them fall
Free as the wind
Your words helped me conquer my fears
And I love you all
I love you all

(Repeat chorus

Laurie Sings Intro and Outro

America : My country ’tis of thee (Metropolitan Quartet)
Composer: Smith, Samuel Francis
Performer: Metropolitan Quartet
Date Issued: 1914

Sounds Used in Mark’s Bravery Alert

  • Alarm
  • Bravery Alert Music
  • News beeps

Sounds Used in Laurie’s Stories Open and Close

  • Music Theme
  • Applause
  • British Welcome
  • Pages Turning
  • Cello Loop

Sounds Used in Dave Vs. Robot Aliens

  • Knock on Door
  • Space Music 2
  • Opening Space Music
  • Creaking Door
  • Door Slam
  • Dun Dun Dun
  • Laurie Memory Music
  • Space Choir
  • Evil Childish Laughter
  • Ending Choir

Sounds used in Laurie’s Foolish Fun Intro

  • Slide Whistle sounds
  • Background Tune/Beat
  • Girl’s Laughter
  • Phone Ring

Sounds used in Stéfanie’s Secret Topic Intro

  • Space background loop
  • Space Alien ray gun zap sound
  • The Human Has been Neutralised
  • Eating Chips
  • Zen Cello

Sounds used in Mark’s No-Diet Report Intro

  • News Jingle
  • News Ting

Sounds Used in the Writing Group Stories

The Judge

  • Epic music
    Mike TheTunk Woloszyn” www.Senproductions.de
  • Courtroom crowd
  • gavel
  • laser gun
  • Fart

The Birch Bat

  • Ukulele background music
  • Bat and crowd
  • ballpark organ and crowd
  • birds
  • axe

The Collector

  • Metal Clink
  • Soundtrack
  • Police are close
  • Key fob chirp

The Beach

  • Ocean
  • Flute
  • Seagull

Other Sounds

  • Crowd Cheering
  • Crowd awww
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Half a chocolate and other Christmas Miracles!

Coffee cup and half of a chocolate on a table
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It’s a Christmas Eve Miracle! I only ate half of this chocolate, and I even like it. It was just that one bite was enough.

A Different Kind of Christmas

This my dears, is the true Christmas story of Laurie, Mark, and the impact of Intuititve Eating. Mark and I made a different kind of Christmas for ourselves this year. No family or friends were on our horizon, so we decided to turn our solitude into an adventure opportunity. We took off in our convertible up the coast to the Danish town of Solvang. Here’s just one of the incredible views we saw on the way.

Sunset by the coast.

One of the many beautiful vistas we saw driving up to Solvang.

As you can see from the very first photo in this story, I had some amazing Intuititve Eating success and progress. I also had some challenges. Intutitive Eating for me is more than about how much food I eat. It’s also about accepting myself with kindness and love, and making decisions that allow me to have the most authentic and relationship-primary life I can. What a weird phrase I just coined, ‘Relationship-primary’. But it IS one of my goals, because frankly, my food and my body concerns have been my top concern over everything and everybody else for most of my life. That’s what disordered eating is. Just like any addiction, not only does it mess with you with physical consequences, it messes with your life in the form of off-kilter choices in how you deal with people and events.

A Dawn of a New Day

Dawn streaked clouds in blue sky

Amazing dawn greets me from the terrace of our room. I get to have coffee with this view.

This amazing photo was taken at the same time as I ate half of a chocolate, the dawn of Christmas Eve. A wonderful chance gave us one of the few rooms in this hotel that has a terrace outside of its sliding door. I took advantage to relax and take in my surroundings. To observe the beauty of nature, somewhat privately, yet hearing the hotel-piped Christmas music is a relaxing and gratitude inducing experience. At this moment, all was right with my world.

The Good

When I went down to get my coffee, I was greeted with a winter wonderland and an explosion of holiday decorations. I LOVED it. I felt festive and happy.

Laurie in front of the character, Olaf from Frozen

Olaf and I have a tender moment. The hotel has a whole area dedicated to photo ops from the movie, Frozen. Fun to watch the kids get excited here.

Another fun thing I love here is the chance to play ‘Bad Cats’ – my favorite pinball machine. It brings me back to my youth when there was no digital anything. When cameras had film, phone had cords, and teen hangouts had pinball wizards. Sadly, I wasn’t a wizard, but I LOVED to play. Pinball takes me outside of my body and all concentration is on those buzzers and bells. The machines are physical in how you gain feedback in a way video games are not. I love to play pinball. Mark and I had fun taking turns and laughing as much when we quickly lost our ball as when we made all of the buzzers sound and heard the exciting cry of ‘Bad Cats’.

Laurie in front of pinball machine - Bad Cats

One of my favorite things to do at this property. They have old style pinball – Bad Cats! It meows, hisses and makes me laugh.

Solvang – More Good – Mostly

Horse drawn trolley with Belgium Draft horses

Mark wants to go on the horse trolley tour of the Danish style town of Solvang. We did, it was awesome!

Solvang is a Danish style town up in the wine country of Santa Ynez. It was depicted well in the male-mid-life-crisis-buddy picture, Sideways. Mark and I in fact, ate dinner the night before Christmas Eve at the Hitching Post, the restaurant featured in Sideways. Delish! We ate for hours, drank a fine pinot, and I had no feeling of fear or of being overstuffed. I ate just enough for me and enjoyed it throughly. It was a good memory and enjoying our meal and each other was the focus of our night. Relationship-Primary Success!

Next day, at Solvang, Mark broke character and bought me a Christmas gift. This is what he used to do early in our marriage. But because we are such savers, we haven’t done something like this for a long time. Usually, we just window shop, if at all, not wanting more stuff to clean or to spend our money unwisely. We tend to go for exerience over things. But this cat pin feels like both. More of a souvenir of a great day, proof of Mark’s thoughtful knowlege of what I like, and a trinket I can hold rather than just another dust collector.

Close up of a gold cat pin with blue shell in center

Mark picked out and bought me this stylish cat pin in Solvang. I LOVE when he finds me gifts – we don’t do this as much as we used to, being retired and having tons of stuff. But this was special.

We also laughed and drank at the beer garden some dunkel bier (dark beer) in memory of my dad, who would have LOVED to be in a beer garden – not because he ever drank much (I inherit my low tolerance from him) but because of his love of all things German.

Laurie seated across a table raises a small beer with a huge glass of beer in the foreground

Mark enjoyed the contrast between my small and his large beer at the beer garden.

The Bad

As you can imagine from our ‘horsing around’, trinket shopping and beer garden adventures, we were feeling very jolly. We danced in a gazebo in a park and spied a Santa House and chair. We laughed and decided to grab a ‘Santa Selfie’ for fun. Enter the samaritan who insists on taking our photo for us to ‘include’ everything.

All of a sudden I’m not having fun. I’m feeling anxious, puffy, fat, out of control and this slender, kind, woman (bitch) is taking forever to snap many full body shots of a scene I don’t want to see. In it, I look strained, because I am not SITTING on Mark’s lap, I am perching holding my own weight. We thought our selfie to take 3 seconds. This went on and on and on. Again, she was being kind, and wanted a photo of hersef in return.

Here’s the evil (in my mind) result.

Laurie sites on Mark's lap at the Santa house

I’m being brave here. A lady took this photo, and not being prepared, I now get the chance to see what we look like at this angle. Normally, I’d discard or crop this result. But it was such a fun moment, I’m learning to accept ALL of myself, unflattering angles or not.

Between my murderous rage, and the maturity to write the miraculous caption above for the Santa photo, much went down.

Feeling Ugly

After the none-too-soon exit of the kind photo snapping stranger, Mark reviewed the photos on his phone and stealed himself for the question, he knew was coming.

‘Honey, is this a bad picture or do I look this way?’

‘Er…uh…Sorry, Hon, you look this way.’

‘WHAT?! When did THAT happen?’

‘Er I think with all of our going out and all…”


‘I think you’ve been puting on some weight the last 3 weeks’ (This was said all in a rush).

I collapse in a puddle of tears, embarrassment and disgrace.I’m speechless with self-deceit, disappointment in my size, and remorse for my ‘food sin’ that obviously got me to this state of woe but WORSE is that I feel these painful emoitions. Aren’t I doing well with Intuitive Eating? Aren’t I self-accepting? How the hell have I been wearing the same size and putting on 10 pounds at least? How? How? HOW? And HOW COME I FEEL THESE OLD SHAME FEELINGS ON CHRISTMAS!

More Miracles

Now as we have discussed many times, Mark is wonderful, but emotional discusions are not his strong suit. This time, he simply held me and let me cry. His shirt was soaked, he kissed my hair – he NEVER kisses my hair, and said, we’ve been eating out a lot. We haven’t been exercising as much, and you are still you – remember?

Still me?

He’s right! It’s ok to feel all of my feelings. I DID feel all of those bad feelings. I didn’t ask for more beer, or chocolate, or pastry. I cried on Mark’s shirt.

We went on to celebrate our hotel Christmas Eve with a music box we fell in love with.

Then on Christmas we caught a movie

Laurie by Into the Woods movie poster

Me by the Into the Woods movie poster. We saw the first show on Christmas Day.

Mark decided to be a photographer all day to take photos that celebrate how much fun I have and how good it feels to be me, no matter what I weigh.

Laurie in a red convertible with bikes leaned against it

Mark thought it woud be cute to show me in our red car with our red bikes in my red helmut. I’m ALWAYS happy in my car.

Then a Christmas bike ride – Mark made the effort to show me how strong I am.

Finally, back to the hotel after a long day of fun, hugs and feeling glad to be me.

Laurie leans on a white bridge with characters from Frozen and white Christmas trees in the background

I’m feeling like a princess in the photo place where you can meet up with Elsa, Olaf and other characters from Frozen. Mark has been MY prince this day.

Intutitive Eating

Intuitive Eating for me is a way to connect with my body and my feelings. It isn’t a magic pill. It doesn’t guarentee to make you thinner. It doesn’t wipe out all of the negative thought patterns built up over a life time. But my practice of it, did lead to true communication with my husband, true looks at myself, inside and out, and a true appreciation for all of my life, body, mind and soul. If that’s not a Christmas miracle, what is? Hope your holidays were wonderful BCs, but if you had some struggles, feel free to share. I understand.

If you would like to see more photos and videos of our trip, check me out on Instagram at LaurieDreamWeaver and look for the hashtag #ChristmasInCalifornia
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Ep 0075 – My Bravery Report – Voice Acting and Singing Classes

Laurie in front of a sound booth
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I’m smiling because I don’t realize HOW messy my hair is at this very moment. Instead, I’m just SO happy to be at my first voice acting lesson and to have experienced recording from inside of a real sound booth.

Podcast Recap

Back on the mountain I let go of the stew of anxiety and doubt swirling around trying new things, newly tight pants, photos that make you look as bad as possible AND discover that Photoshop can crop your negative thinking as well as those pesky bad photo angles! Max’s 20/20 show is delayed due to the passing of Joan Rivers. I’m LaurieDreamWeaver on Instagram and I like to see your photos. A shout-out to Sophie from Scotland. I decide to make certificates for catching up with all of the show episodes and mention how to sign up for the show email list so you can be one of the first to see them. Welcome to new brave companion Annie! Last show, Stéfanie’s Secret Topic of the Day triggered a comment conversation between Cheryl, Marquita and me. Marquita is on the bravery report for calling the bravery hotline! I’m on the bravery report too for sharing the stories and clips from my first voice acting class and my first singing lesson.

Laurie with Marc Cashman in a sound booth

My teacher, award winning voice actor and director, Marc Cashman, with me in the booth at my first voice acting lesson.

Trail path in shade

From the start of the trail you can see how I chase the shade up the mountain by starting early in the day. Once the sun is up, it is unrelenting heat.


My Instagram page at LaurieDreamWeaver

FaceBook Page if you want to sign up for our email list by clicking Tiger the Cat’s Sign-up button

Write me a private message via the contact form

Last episode with Stéfanie’s Secret Topic

Cheryl’s comment about people needing connection and about meditation on Day 74

Marquita’s reply to Cheryl on Day 74

Cheryl’s supportive comment back on Day 74

My 2 cents worth comparing our isolation to the Little Prince

The Little Prince on Amazon – please use the links below

The Little Prince

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Dawny’s encouragement to me on FB prior to my first voice acting class

Marc Cashman’s website. Marc is an award winning voice director and actor and my voice acting teacher. I highly recommend his classes!

My cropped voice acting photo on FB and Fionna’s supportive comment

Sue and Dawny support me on FB about my singing lesson

The website of Vicki Hilferty, my singing teacher

Want to have Fun Being Foolish too?

Participate in our new feature called “Foolish Fun“. Just call the bravery hotline 206-350-6445 or check out the send audio page on http://www.compulsiveovereatingdiary.com/how-to-send-audio/
And tell us a joke, riddle, a silly story, limerick, sing a song, play a kazoo, ANYTHING but talk about compulsive eating. This is the feature where messing up is just part of the act! No names required and Silly Aliases are AOK! Need ideas? See Day 54’s Resource of the Day for my page of ToonaCat Jokes

Catch up with Laurie

My Spreaker page. Please follow me there if you are on Spreaker.

My Instagram page at LaurieDreamWeaver

FaceBook Page if you want to sign up for our email list by clicking Tiger the Cat’s Sign-up button

Laurie on Tumblr

My page with instructions for all of the ways (so far) that you can send audio and lend your voice to this podcast.

New free way to leave voicemail http://speakpipe.com/laurieweaver You can also click the blue button on this page that says ‘send a voice message.’

Bravery Hotline

Leave your comments, questions, feelings and stories on Laurie’s podcast voicemail hotline – 206-350-6445.


Host: Laurie Weaver
Voice Director: Marc Cashman of Cashman Commercials
Singing Teacher: Victoria Hilferty of Hilferty House

Main Theme:I’m Letting Go by Josh Woodward from The Simple Life Part 1

I’m Letting Go (Josh Woodward) / CC BY 3.0

Resource of the day

Dreams Quotes: Achieve Your Dreams
‘Achieve your dreams’ quotes from some of the world’s most famous leaders and celebrities. Motivation when for when you’d like to try something to move you closer to your dreams!
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